True Beauty Recap: CJ Survives, Monique Is Sent Packing
With two not-so-truly beautiful contestants gone, the remaining eight supremely confident True Beauties vied for more bathroom time and the ultimate prize.
CJ‘s surprising return from the Hall of Beauty left narciss-artist Ray sagely wondering aloud about the judges, “They must be looking for something else, something deeper…” Ray, who alternates between intelligent and ridiculously dim-witted, seemed to be the first to catch on to the show’s premise.
Chelsea, who did little to make friends in the first two weeks, continued her self-ostracism with only CJ as an ally. The equally outspoken Monique seemed bent on Chelsea’s ouster, saying of her aerosol-addicted nemesis, “My personal mission is to get rid of her…. She irritates the sh– out of me!’
This week’s challenge, an action photo shoot dubbed Beauty In Motion, split the remaining eight into two teams of four, with Red Team-against-Blue Team, or as CJ so eloquently phrased it, “Arnold vs. Danny DeVito.” Captain of the losing team, and the player with the worst photo as decided by the judges, would be sent to the dreaded Hall of Beauty. CJ, who earlier had compared himself to Michael Jordan, was named the captain of the Blue Team, and did little to instill confidence in his group when he openly admitted, “Sure, I like basketball, but I’m not a ‘sports guy.'” Joel captained the Red team. The buff software sales rep was looking to draw blood. “I am going to kill!!’ admitted the “party-boy.”
The subsequent action photos were good for a laugh, but the judges were more concerned with how their “beauties” dealt with the mole/stylist that was pretending to argue with her philandering boyfriend over the phone.
CJ and Julia both showed enough compassion to pass their test, the most brilliant, and more telling moments came from Monique and Chelsea, who responded by respectively belching and coughing up phlegm in front of the distraught stylist. One has to love a girl that can belch in the face of another’s crisis, but one has to truly respect the girl that actually walks past a weeping woman to spit into the bushes.
What is a beauty contest without an impromptu “toga” party? At model Laura‘s behest, the group celebrated by wrapping themselves in sheets, and getting drunk and playing a game of Truth Or Dare. Aside from Laura’s pixelated lap dance for Billy, it was artist Ray who stole the show with a naked saunter around the pool that had the show’s producers using the True Beauty logo to edit out his unmentionable bits. Monique may have put it best when she said, “Ray’s flapping business is burned into my brain for eternity!”
Post-toga party and mid-hangover, it was announced (with little surprise) that the Blue Team had lost the competition, leaving CJ and a weepy Monique to walk the Hall of Beauty. A final test was devised for the exotic dancer and the “star” barista.
Monique may have wowed the judges with her figure-hugging black cocktail dress, but the fact that she didn’t even glance at an empty water bottle tossed at her feet, much less pick up the offending litter, left the trio with little choice. So Monique was sent packing and had to come face to face with a replay of her belch that was heard around the world. –Reagan Alexander