"I left Montana really down on this whole experience," he writes of his most recent dates

By Sean Lowe
February 05, 2013 08:15 AM
Taylor Hill/Getty

Sean Lowe is the star of season 17 of The Bachelor, which airs Mondays on ABC. The hunky Dallas businessman and entrepreneur will be blogging about his romantic journey for PEOPLE.com.

I couldn’t wait to start my week in Montana on The Bachelor. The L.A. dates were fun, but I wanted to get away and experience new things with the women.

Whitefish, Mont., is one of the coolest towns I have ever visited. The mountains, trees and rivers made this the perfect destination for romance. And I’m an outdoorsy guy, so I knew I would really connect with the women that shared a similar appreciation for nature.

My first date with Lindsay couldn’t have gone better. We both felt so comfortable around each other and being together just felt right. We took the helicopter to the mountaintop of Glacier National Park, which was one of the coolest things I’ve ever done, and we set up our picnic.

What you didn’t get to see on TV was Lindsay and I wrestling! This tiny girl told me that she wrestled in high school, so of course I had to challenge her to a match. I’ve got about 100 lbs. on her, but she still took me down. I love Lindsay’s playful and fun spirit, and it’s what really separated her from everyone else.

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We had even more fun that evening. She opened up about her dad being away while serving in Iraq and the fear that came with that. She also told me of her mother’s strength and how she held the family together during his absence.

It finally clicked for me as to where Lindsay’s supportive and caring nature comes from. Every other girl would hound me about getting a one-on-one date and Lindsay never did. Instead, she would always remind me that she’s not going anywhere and she thinks it’s good that I get to know everyone else so that I’ll eventually learn that she’s the one for me.

We ended the night dancing in the town square. It was one of the most memorable nights of my life. Lindsay definitely solidified herself as a front-runner in my mind.

Group Date

The group date was a lot of fun. The girls were much more excited about the relay race than they were for roller derby. Watching them try to canoe, chop wood and milk a goat was hilarious!

Every girl gave it all she had and so I was sad to see the blue team go home. I remember going home after losing the sailing completion in Bermuda and it was a terrible feeling. Time is a valuable commodity and no one wants to lose it.

After getting ready for the evening, I couldn’t stop thinking about the women of the blue team. And then it hit me – I couldn’t let a silly race affect my time with these women. After all, I agreed to be the Bachelor in hopes of finding my wife, and it wasn’t fair to me to miss out on time with them at this stage in the journey just because they lost a race.

I made the executive decision to bring the blue team back, which obviously upset everyone on the red team. I didn’t enjoy hurting their feelings, but I knew it was the right thing to do.

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The standout of the night was Daniella. She showed me the vulnerability that I had been looking for. And then there’s Tierra … I had no idea she was going to surprise me and I certainly wasn’t ready for it. I didn’t know what to think about her visit, mostly because I was in shock seeing her there and knew the other women would be upset if they found out. But I was also flattered that she made the effort. I definitely was not seeing the same person the other women saw.

Two-on-One Date

The dreaded two-on-one date was awkward from the beginning. Trying to show each girl attention during the date was not easy and it was anything but fun. Tierra definitely had the edge on Jackie going into the date, but I was still very open-minded.

Jackie is a quiet person who had a hard time standing out. I knew she was sweet and good-looking, but I didn’t know much else. I was really hoping that she would break out of her shell on that date and show me something I’d yet to see, but that never came.

When it came time to make the decision on who gets the rose it was pretty obvious that Tierra was my girl. Keep in mind, I had no idea that the other women disliked her so much! I knew she had a hard time fitting in, but I wasn’t privy to the fact that she was simply not nice to the other girls. Things would’ve been different if I had seen those actions.

Rose Ceremony

The rose ceremony frustrated me because no one would give me specific reasons why Tierra was not good for me. I was listening to what they had to say, but they weren’t supporting their opinions with any details. I was in the dark and I chalked up their disdain for her to Tierra simply being out of place in this environment.

The decision to send Robyn home wasn’t easy because I truly enjoyed our time together, but I also knew that we didn’t share the same chemistry that I had in my other relationships. I had no idea that she had gotten into a fight with Tierra and I definitely didn’t send her home because I thought she created drama. It simply came down to chemistry.

I left Montana really down on this whole experience. It was the first time I really grew concerned that my potential wife was not amongst this group of women and that I had wasted everyone’s time, including my own.

I was over the drama, over the women talking about the drama, and just wanted to refocus my energy on what mattered – finding a partner that I could see myself with for a lifetime.

We travel to Canada on the next episode, which airs at a special day and time – Tuesday (9 p.m. ET) on ABC.

Thanks for watching!

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