"I didn't realize that the women were so mean," Flajnik blogs about this week's episode

By Ben Flajnik
January 17, 2012 08:30 AM
Credit: Craig Sjodin/ABC

I think Mötley Crüe said it best: “Home Sweet Home.” San Francisco is the one place on the globe where I am truly happy and feel completely myself. I was so excited to show these women this amazing city and get to know everyone so much better.

The dates this week on The Bachelor were really awesome, as well, and I couldn’t wait to go on them.

Let’s start with hands down the craziest thing I have ever done in my life – climbing to the top of the Bay Bridge.

Emily and I both had (and probably still have) a fear of heights so it was nice to have someone that understood exactly what I was feeling, and vice versa. Emily got pretty freaked out on the bridge, but I will admit, I was right there with her. The horns from the trucks below were enough to make you lose your mind. The worst part was thinking that if you passed out on the railing, you would wake up hanging from two ropes off the side of the Bay Bridge. Nuts.

Later in the evening, Emily and I had a great dinner, full of lively conversation, and some amazing fireworks. Emily was very easy to talk to, and I can honestly say I enjoyed every moment of the date with her. I found her to be witty, smart, beautiful and everything that I was looking for in a woman.

On to this week’s group date: Aside from my flat-ironed hair, everything was going great. I mean, come on, who has ever gone skiing in San Francisco? Kacie B. was the woman who stuck out most to me on the skiing portion of the date. She just bombed the hill as many times as she possibly could, which was awesome. I love someone that is up for a challenge and loves to have fun.

Later that evening, Brittany’s departure came as a total shock to me. I respected that fact that her heart wasn’t in it and that she didn’t want to take away from the other women and their time with me. I wonder what Grandma Sheryl had to say when Brittany got home.

My date with Lindzi was something I had been looking forward to since the first cocktail party. I gave her the first impression rose for a reason and in doing so, I told her it was going to be awhile before our first date. I didn’t want to put a target on her back early on so I waited until late in San Francisco to take her out.

The shining moment with Lindzi was in the piano store. I felt like I had known her for a long time, and in that moment I knew there was something special between us.

Shawntel Returns

So I have heard from everyone that makes this show happen that this was truly the craziest cocktail party and rose ceremony in Bachelor history. Having only seen one other season (Brad Womack’s), I would have to agree. Wow. Nothing in my life would have ever prepared me for the s––– storm that happened that night.

After watching, I didn’t realize that the women were so mean to Shawntel and I was a bit taken aback. I mean I knew it was a bold move on Shawntel’s part, but some of the women took it a bit too far.

Shawntel and I had chatted a few times in between seasons and I thought she was an interesting, beautiful woman and she was right to assume that there was a connection. There was, but the timing was wrong. So, you can imagine how surprised I was when she showed up to the cocktail party unannounced.

I knew if I kept Shawntel around I would lose all the credibility I had built with these women and it wouldn’t be easy to dig myself out of that hole.

Let’s put it this way – if Shawntel had started the journey with the rest of the women it might have been different. But I was already so happy with the group of women that I had that I wasn’t about to jeopardize the rest of my experience in trying to find love. I do want to thank Shawntel though for coming. She gave up a lot to try this and I really respect her for it.

Well, that’s it for San Francisco. What a ride!

For more on The Bachelor, check out Chris Harrison’s blog on EW.com