Maci Bookout took a trip to Arizona from her home in Tennessee to visit costar Catelynn Baltierra in rehab
Two of MTV’s favorite stars came together to overcome their shared pain.
Catelynn was in therapy at a treatment facility after suffering a miscarriage and having suicidal thoughts and was surprised to find someone she could relate to when Bookout told her she had also miscarried.
“What have you been doing out here?” Bookout asked her.
“Tons of therapy, and group therapy, trauma classes… it’s been really good, though, honestly,” Catelynn told her.
“So, what was going on? Did anything happen [or] just life?” Bookout asked.
“Well, not really. Me and Tyler actually got pregnant and then I got a miscarriage,” Catelynn said.
“Oh wow,” Bookout said. “Taylor and I also had a miscarriage this year.”
“I’m sorry Maci,” Catelynn said.
“Yeah, it’s tough. We haven’t told anyone. I think it’s another one of those things, it doesn’t make the pain easier, but it just makes the experience easier to talk about,” Bookout said. “It doesn’t help anybody to pretend like it didn’t happen or like that baby didn’t exist in some form.”
Tyler Baltierra agreed, adding, “Yeah because we said it may not have been a fully developed baby in the womb but it was in our hearts.”
After meeting with Catelynn, Bookout spent some time with Tyler discussing how she was progressing in therapy.
“She seems better and better every time I see her,” Tyler said. “Once that miscarriage happened it was just,” he said as he blew air out of his mouth.
“How long had y’all known?” Bookout asked him, referring to how long they’d known Catelynn was pregnant.
RELATED VIDEO: Teen Mom OG’s Maci Bookout Reveals She Suffered a Miscarriage
“We were going on like almost three weeks. I just didn’t expect to see all that blood everywhere and just, oh my God, it was traumatic,” he said. “It’s like a murder scene. I’ve never seen Cate that afraid in my life. Her eyes, she was shaking.”
Bookout nodded, saying, “That’s tough and it sucks and it’s tough because there’s nothing you can really do, you know what I mean?”
“I know, it drives me nuts. I hate seeing [her] in all this pain and agony and there’s literally nothing I can do about it,” he said.
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He continued, “Cate kept [saying], like, ‘What did I do, maybe I shouldn’t have ran to the car.’ I kept looking at her and saying, ‘you did nothing wrong.’ ”
“For me, I believe in God and I’m like does he not think that I was worthy of being this child’s mom? What’s going on?” Bookout said. “You just have to accept the thoughts and there’s no wrong way to feel. You just can’t let it take over.”
She added, “The thing that helps me the most, especially when I seem to get down in the funk of it all, is to just be thankful for the babies I do have.”
Bookout opened up about her miscarriage during an episode of Teen Mom OG in January, when she and husband Taylor McKinney were discussing whether they wanted to attempt another pregnancy or adopt.
The conversation took a turn when Bookout quietly reminded McKinney of why they should take their time trying to adopt or conceive. As he walked away after getting upset, an MTV producer asked what had occurred.
“I had a miscarriage,” Bookout told her. “Her name’s Dandy, Dandelion.”
When he returned, McKinney said, “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“I think it’s important for people that are watching that we talk about it,” Bookout shared.
Teen Mom OG airs Mondays (9 p.m. ET) on MTV.