“It was very emotionally intense for me,” he shared. “My first initial reaction was to just to help Cate. I ran to her, held her. We cried. We just held each other for probably two hours and just cried.”
Added Tyler: “That was our way of kind of letting go and accepting reality for what it is.”
The 26-year-old reality star went on to explain how he felt a pressure to be “strong” for his wife and keep his emotions hidden, despite being “devastated” about the loss.
“From a guy’s perspective — not to sound sexist — it’s almost more acceptable for a woman to break down and be emotional,” he explained. “But I swear, as a man, when I walked away from Cate and I didn’t have to be so strong, I was breaking down every single day.”
At times, he said, his emotional breakdowns happened while Catelynn, 26, was in treatment to cope with her depression and he was taking care of their daughter Novalee, 3½.
“I was taking Nova to school and just crying every single day,” he continued. “I’m assuming a lot of women do the same thing. It’s just not really talked about a lot with men… it should be talked about more.”
However, Tyler said he felt a responsibility to keep his daughter “as peaceful and calm as possible” during the difficult loss, which in turn, also kept him moving forward.
“Seeing Nova and realizing that I can’t sit here and sulk in my pity. I’ve gotta be strong, engage with my daughter, play with her, take her to the park,” he explained. “I still had a job to do of raising her around the happiest environment I could make for her. I kind of felt that she was my motivation to keep strong, looking at her and saying, ‘I did lose this child, but look at this beautiful child I’ve got now.’ She helped me push myself forward and keep going.”
Still, he made sure to be upfront about his feelings to his daughter, especially when it came to Catelynn being away from the family while she sought out professional help.
“I don’t think parents should hide their emotions from their kids because I think it’s important to show them that, ‘Hey, we’re human. It’s OK, cry, you can be upset about things,'” he said.
“But I didn’t want to do it overboard with her, especially with her going through the separation of Cate not being there,” he continued. “She didn’t need another parent to be broken down, she needed a strong one.”
Months after the tragic loss, the longtime couple learned they were expecting their third child together.
“The big news is that we are expecting our rainbow baby. This baby is our rainbow after the storm. I’m super excited,” the mother-of-two revealed in September. “It was a huge shock at first. We were not planning it, especially after the miscarriage and how I went downhill with my mental illness.”
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She added: “We were going to wait a really long time. We were using protection and everything and still got pregnant. This baby just wanted to be here. It was very unexpected.”
Catelynn later told PEOPLE that while she does worry about suffering another painful loss, she’s determined to put the past behind her and move forward with her growing family.
“I think it’s always going to be in the back of somebody’s head when you struggle, like, with a miscarriage,” she says. “But I mean, I was just — I put it in God’s hands, really. Whatever happens is meant to happen and I just kind of go with whatever His plan is.”