Sister Wives' Christine Brown Talks 'Roller Coaster' Marriage to Kody: I've 'Changed Phenomenally'
"Just like all relationships, there's just been ups and downs," Christine Brown told PEOPLE ahead of the season 10 premiere in February
"For me as a person, I changed phenomenally, I think," Christine, 49, told PEOPLE in February about how her relationships with husband Kody Brown and fellow sister wives Janelle, Meri and Robyn have changed over the past decade.
"You've got to look at yourself a lot more when you have a mirror held up to you, 'cause you're, you know, you see yourself. So, it's just, that part of it, I think, has changed more than anything," continued the TLC star.
During the series' season 10 finale on Sunday evening, Christine discussed her desire to leave Flagstaff, Arizona, and move back to Utah after polygamy was decriminalized in the state — an idea that her plural family wasn't on board with.
The mother of six — she shares Aspyn, Mykelti, Paedon, Gwendlyn, Ysabel and Truely with Kody — also opened up about the state of her nearly 30-year marriage. After telling sister wife Meri, 50, "I can't do marriage with Kody anymore," Christine admitted in a confessional that "the relationship that I have with Kody isn't what I would want," and added: "What I have here is not what I want right now."
While she said she "agreed to move to Flagstaff and I followed Kody here," Christine told cameras that "it's been a struggle the whole time. I'm tired of feeling like I don't matter. I'm tired of not having his support when I really need it. I'm just tired. I need a partnership. I need something different than this."
Speaking with PEOPLE in February, Christine expanded on where her relationships stood with Kody, 52, and the sister wives, admitting that "there's ups and downs."
"Just like all relationships, there's just been ups and downs. And it's like, it's the gift that keeps on giving, though, 'cause you film it, and then you could answer questions about it, and then you get to watch it, and then you get to do reruns on it, whatever, things like that. So you see yourself in a light," she explained.
Christine went on to say that "the relationships with my sister wives and Kody, they've come and gone, they've ebb and flowed. It's a roller coaster ride," and noted that "there's always ups and downs."
Along with their relationships having highs and lows, Christine said she's also seen herself change significantly over the course of 10 seasons.
"But I think as a person, I've changed more than anything. You know, rather than the relationships changing," she said. "There's nothing like watching yourself on television to really show you your flaws and really show you things that you can work on and have those reality checks."
In spite of their differing opinions and perspectives, the reality star said she appreciates the way her family speaks to one another.
"I also really appreciate that we don't yell at each other. Like, so some reality television shows where they like, lose their minds at the other people and they yell and stuff. And just today, [daughter] Ysabel was like, 'What is it gonna be like?' And I said, 'Well, it's just gonna be like we are today.' She's like, 'Oh, that's so boring.' But I'm super grateful for that boring," she shared.
Christine added: "Because I don't want to be those people that are yelling at each other. So, that, I'm extremely grateful for my sister wives and Kody for."
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