'RHOBH' 's Garcelle Beauvais Says She's Not in a Rush to Find a Man: 'I Have Such a Full Life'

"We put so much pressure on women," Garcelle Beauvais tells PEOPLE of the dating world

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Published on April 6, 2022 10:00 AM

She memorably met with a dating coach on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills but Garcelle Beauvais says she's in no rush to settle down if it's not with the right person.

"I have such a full life," The Real co-host, actress and mom of three tells PEOPLE. "I don't want to just bring anybody in as a seat filler. I really want it to be the person. I feel like we put so much pressure on women to have a man, be married, have kids. Can we just live our lives?"

Beauvais, 55, gets even more candid in her new memoir, Love Me As I Am, on stands now.

"It was like therapy," says Beauvais of writing the book. "But I feel like I've made peace with a lot of things, so that's why now it feels like a good time to share."

The star opens up about her painful divorce from ex Mike Nilon after she discovered that he had had an affair. Beauvais and Nilon share 14-year-old twins Jax and Jaid.

"I was so angry, and hurt and confused," she recalls. "With the betrayal, I thought, 'Was I not enough?' But then I realized that it wasn't about me at all."

Ultimately, "one of the reasons I didn't stay married is because I didn't want to change my spirit," says Beauvais, who is also mom to 31-year-old son Oliver. "This is my one shot at life. And I didn't think it would be fair for my kids to live with a mom who has so much angst."

Yet Beauvais and Nilon have found a way to maintain a close friendship while amicably co-parenting. "I couldn't hate the man [my kids] love so much," she says.

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And these days, with her hosting gig on The Real and filming RHOBH, Beauvais is busier than ever — and reflecting on what she has brought to the Bravo show thus far.

"I want to be as carefree as everyone else, but I can't because I come with other things," says Beauvais, the first Black woman cast in the Beverly Hills franchise. "I didn't want it to be heavy, but at the same time I have to say, well, my world is different. And I have to say I think the show has handled those conversations really well."

As far as Lisa Rinna, with whom she's had a turbulent relationship of late? "That's a work in progress!" says Beauvais with a laugh.

Love Me As I Am will be available on April 12.