Balancing work and family has taken a toll on Kandi Burruss and Todd Tucker's marriage, they admitted on Sunday's Real Housewives of Atlanta

By Dave Quinn
April 12, 2020 09:00 PM
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Tensions between Kandi Burruss and Todd Tucker spilled over on Sunday’s episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta.

After weeks of arguing, the couple sat down for an emotional therapy session, in which they both admitted their hectic work schedules had left them emotionally distant in their marriage, struggling to just enjoy their time together.

“I think we’ve been so focused on success that we’ve become great business partners,” explained Tucker, 46. “We love each other to death, but we just haven’t had time to be happy lately.”

“Every now and then we have our moments where it’s like, ‘[Grrr],’ because it’s been so much happening, we get stressed, and sometimes we can go off on each other,” shared Burruss, 43. “For me it typically spawns from something work related.”

Their sex life has become a reflection of that, they both confessed to their therapist. “It’s not as good as it used to be,” Burruss said. “Not saying the sex ain’t good, but meaning we haven’t been having sex as much.”

“We get in the bed … get that out of our system … [and] we bot get back to work,” Tucker said. “We on some real ‘conquer the world’ stuff, and it’s a gift and a curse.”

Burruss and Tucker’s busy plates are nothing new. Since marrying in 2014, the two have worked non-stop on a sea of projects, including a trucking company and a soul food restaurant chain that Tucker has spearheaded called The Old Lady Gang (OLG). Burruss dove into a handful of entertainment projects — from her own talk show, Kandi Koated Nights, to an appearance on Celebrity Big Brother and a reunion tour with her band, Xscape.

Recently, Burruss has been expanding her resumé with scripted acting roles. At the time of filming this season of RHOA, she was preparing for her arc on The Chi‘s third season, set to premiere this July.

Kandi Burruss and Todd Tucker
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That role, which shot in Chicago, was a point of contention for Tucker. On last week’s RHOA, he confronted Burruss for not spending enough time with her family when she was back in Atlanta, criticizing her for attending cast events and making public appearances instead.

“When you come back, you book every hour that you have. It just doesn’t make sense,” Tucker said. “At a certain point you have to be like, ‘I need my time with my family.’ … You’re doing the acting thing, on top of all the other s—. So it’s like, let some of that s—, go spend some time with your family, and then take your ass back out to Chicago to finish doing your acting thing.

“I guess I’m just trying to make everything work,” Burruss replied.

But that wasn’t enough for Tucker, who pointed out that he walked away from his career in television production when they first started (after meeting while he worked on a RHOA trip to Africa in season 4).

“I sacrificed a lot to support your dreams,” he told his wife. “When I came into this situation with you, I wasn’t good enough. It was like, I gotta speedball fast enough to make a lot of money so that I can be good enough — good enough not only to your mama, but to the f—ing world. It was a lot of pressure.”

“I figured it out to make everybody else happy,” Tucker continued. “I don’t do the s— that I like to do, like production and TV and film. That’s s— that I was doing before. I haven’t really done that s—. I didn’t take jobs because jobs didn’t pay me what I make now. I was able to become a business entity that makes a lot of money. Everybody accepts the money guy. He’s good, he’s the best, he’s this. But I’m not happy.”

“I’m not really stepping out there because I’m so worried about making sure I stay this guy,” Tucker added.

Adding to the stress was the fact that they had a baby on the way, via surrogate (daughter Blaze, born on Nov. 22, 2019).

The couple are already parents to 4-year-old son Ace Wells. They also have two children from previous relationships, Kandi’s girl Riley, 17, and Tucker’s daughter Kaela, 23.

Though both told their therapist on Sunday’s RHOA they were “excited” to expand their family, Tucker stressed to Burruss that she needs to make more time for them.

“I’m here at the house, I see how it affects the kids,” Tucker said. “My son … he’ll come, 4 a.m. and get in the bed and he’ll say, ‘Where’s mommy?’ You can’t be at everything, so you have to prioritize what you value. If you value your career, which I’m supporting you, then you prioritize your friends and their events, and then your family? I don’t know if that makes total sense.”

Breaking down into tears, Burruss promised Tucker that she never intended to put her family last.

“I do realize that I have an issue with trying to find balance, and I’m definitely a person that, even if I didn’t get a chance to sleep, if I was there to help support everybody’s thing, I would do that,” she said. “I’m not trying to [choose that over my family].”

In the end, they agreed to “focus on Kandi and Todd time” moving forward.

The Real Housewives of Atlanta airs Sundays (8 p.m. ET) on Bravo.