July 24, 2017 05:29 PM

 

Last week on The Real Housewives of Orange County, returning housewife Lydia McLaughlin met cast mate Shannon Beador for the first time — and one of them ran away in anger.

Opening up to PEOPLE Now on her battle with Beador and the toxic relationship between costars Tamra Judge and Vicki Gunvalson, McLaughlin said she’s already had regrets about coming back on the show. “When you hang out with somebody you’re like, ‘Oh, I can’t believe I said that.’ So, of course I have regrets.”

McLaughlin might have been referring to her unfortunate comparison of Beador’s behavior to Gunvalson’s, who had once spread a rumor that Beador’s husband “beat the s— out of her.”

The episode, McLaughlin said, was painful to finally see. “It was hard for me to watch the episode with Shannon where she, I feel, doesn’t understand what I’m trying to say to her and so she really latches on and is upset with me. I felt like I couldn’t explain you’re mad at me for something I feel I’ve never even said.”

As for the future of their relationship, McLaughlin teased, “We’re gonna have to see. We get together a lot, and every time I feel like somebody runs away or walks away or cries. We have a rocky road ahead of us.”

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The RHOC star also addressed the strained relationship between Gunvalson and Judge, adding that she doesn’t think she can ever mend it. “You can’t! When I was last on the show … they were best friends. They had fought and then they made up. That was my memory of them as just laughing and they are like sisters.  And I think the viewers agree it’s really fun to see their friendship and the banter. And they are like family to each other.”

Her efforts to repair their friendship, however, did not go so well. “I come on and they’re not talking and I just kind of think like, ‘Oh, well you guys just need to sit down and talk.’ But I don’t realize that actually them talking is sometimes quite explosive and I’m literally standing in the middle.”

The Real Housewives of Orange County airs Mondays (9 p.m. ET) on Bravo.

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