Dorinda Medley Reveals the Best Way to Handle a Fight with Her 'RHONY' Costar Bethenny Frankel

Dorinda Medley had learned how to manage arguing with her fiery cast mate

Photo: Noam Galai/WireImage

Dorinda Medley has gotten into a few disagreements with Bethenny Frankel over her time on The Real Housewives of New York City. And while the 51-year-old Housewife can certainly hold her own in a brawl, with Frankel she advises it’s best to diffuse the situation as quickly as possible.

“Sometimes Bethenny talks at you and not talks to you,” she told PEOPLE Now on Monday. “And I think it’s very difficult – you just want to get away from it. ‘Make it stop – whatever you say is right, I just want to go! You’re right, you’re right – okay!’ ”

The two Housewives get into their biggest argument yet on Wednesday’s season 8 finale – an argument Medley still feels anxiety about months later.

“I’m nervous again just watching it again,” she said, watching the clip. “I swear to god, I’m sweating again!”

Medley explained she didn’t see their conflict coming this time around – which centered around a miscommunication over Frankel’s feelings towards Jules Wainstein and her eating disorder.

“I’m coming to a party [Bethenny’s] hosting for her brand, and I was taken off guard,” Medley revealed. “You think you’re just going to come and enjoy the evening and all of a sudden you’re put into a position where you’re backed into a corner and you’re trying to figure out what she’s saying!”

She’s been there before, too – earlier in the season, when Frankel confronted Medley over her relationship with her boyfriend John Mahdessian.

“It’s the one thing I didn’t take into consideration when I started doing this,” Medley says of the the scrutiny Mahdessian received. “I knew that you were going to be looked at a little more closely. But also, people are very different on camera. You have such short [clips] and people judge you and your entirety on that. So I’ve had to sort of take a step back and learn from it to maybe keep things a little more private.”

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The reflection hasn’t been a bad thing for Medley: “Some of the things I’ve had to re-evaluate and sit down and say ‘Hmm I like that, I don’t like that,’ and tweak my life a little bit. Some of it’s been good.”

As for regrets, you won’t find Medley with many – especially when it comes to how she “meddled” into the drama this season.

“I always like to be part of everything,” Medley said. “I don’t think I was ever hurtful. I was trying to be helpful. Did I sometimes light some fires I shouldn’t have lit? Yes. But my intent was good.”

The Real Housewives of New York City airs Wednesdays (9 p.m. ET) on Bravo.