Pete Davidson has previously shared that he's contemplated suicide

By Eric Todisco
June 08, 2020 10:58 AM
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Pete Davidson is reflecting on "dark" times he experienced several years back.

The Saturday Night Live star  — who has been open about his mental health struggles over the years — said in a new interview with CBS Sunday Morning that he "got as close as you can get" to harming himself in 2018.

"I mean, just like testing the waters," Davidson, 26, said. "And until I met the right treatments and met the right doctors and did all the work that you need to do to, like, not feel that way, it got pretty dark and scary."

In one scene from Davidson's upcoming film The King of Staten Island, which he co-wrote and stars in, the comedian closes his eyes while driving on a busy road — an experience he said came from his real life.

"Yeah, that's true. I used to do that," he shared. "That's horrible to say. But yeah, I used to close my eyes on a closed road, usually at night. And I would drive without a seatbelt."

In the film, Davidson tells a semi-autobiographical story to fans —"75 percent autobiographical" — that mirrors the grief he grappled with after the death of his father in the September 11 terrorist attacks on the World Trade Center in 2001.

The actor plays Scott, a 20-something aspiring tattoo artist living at home in his New York City borough hometown, still coming to terms with the loss of his firefighter father, who died 17 years prior.

"I really wanted this to be cleansing for me," Davidson said of the film. "I feel like I got to speak about it in the biggest way possible to get my story out there. I feel like now I could let it go."

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Davidson has been candid about his mental health struggles in recent years.

In February, he reportedly confirmed that he sought treatment for his mental health at the Sierra Tucson treatment center in Arizona during a stand-up show at Carolines on Broadway in New York City.

Later that month, Davidson said in an interview with Charlamagne Tha God published to YouTube that he's "always depressed, all the time."

"I have to constantly bring myself out of it,” said Davidson. “I wake depressed, but now I know my steps. I have to go outside and be in sun for a little bit, or go for a walk. It’s all just programming yourself to trick your brain.”

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The actor also revealed that while he’s contemplated suicide, he “can’t, because I’ve got a mom and a sister and a family.”

“I’ve always been suicidal, but I’ve never had the balls, you know. Which I’m very lucky,” he shared. “For the first time, when I went away this time, I felt like I had maybe, almost, the balls. Because when you’re not feeling good and you’re going through all this stuff and there’s people at your house in Staten Island, it just really drives you f— crazy.”

In 2017, Davidson revealed that he has borderline personality disorder after years of battling depression and anxiety. He also previously sought treatment in 2016.

If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), text “STRENGTH” to the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 or go tosuicidepreventionlifeline.org.