Okay, there’s some way of knowing. Judging from Cyrus’ past performances, her social media presence and her ever-developing hippie persona, we have some predictions for her stint as host.
The moment Cyrus announced the gig on her Twitter – dressed in a green bodysuit, of course – we already started imagining what will go down at the Aug. 30 show.
Here are a few things of which we are certain:
1. There will be props.
Oh, how there will be props! While she likely won’t recycle the iconic foam hand of her VMAs performance past, there will undoubtedly be glitter-and rainbow-themed props incorporated into her routine, especially now that Cyrus currently makes glitter-and rainbow-themed props as her side hustle.
2. Tongues will not remain in mouths.
The tongue-out-of-mouth look that took the 2013 VMAs by storm was not merely a passing phase for Cyrus – she has committed to the pose, sorry, ahem, lifestyle. Even now, she continues to stick her tongue out in virtually all of her photos.
3. There will be passionate speeches about important issues.
The singer has been spending a significant amount of time promoting her Happy Hippie Foundation, which supports gay and transgender youth. After wowing the audience with an emotional (and empowering) speech at the amfAR Inspiration Gala, we’re pretty sure she’ll keep the streak going – and use her platform for good.
4. Animals will, somehow, be involved.
From adopting kittens to puppies to pigs on the regular, Cyrus is animal-obsessed. We can’t imagine her parting with all of her animals for the hours-long gig, so we imagine she’ll find a way to incorporate them.
5. There will be an unknowable number of costume changes.
And by unknowable we mean, like, five or six or 11 million.
6. We’re going to watch it like it’s our job.
Note: This is our only prediction that is 100 percent verified.