The friendship fell apart in the aftermath of speculation circulating online that Henderson and Cavallari's husband Jay Cutler were having an affair

By Aili Nahas and Natalie Stone
January 13, 2020 09:43 PM
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Kristin Cavallari is heartbroken over the fractured state of her friendship with best friend Kelly Henderson.

In the wake of their fallout, which Cavallari, 33, addressed on the season 3 debut of her E! reality show, Very Cavallari, a source tells PEOPLE the pair still has yet to discuss the drama with one another face to face.

“Kristin and Kelly still haven’t spoken. Kristin is very hurt,” says the source.

“She thought Kelly was her best friend and Kelly just didn’t want to admit that she was wrong about how she handled the situation. She just disappeared on Kristin and then reappeared when they started filming again,” says the source. “The ball is in Kelly’s corner now.”

During Thursday’s premiere episode, the former Laguna Beach star revealed she and Henderson hadn’t spoken all summer in the aftermath of the rumor that Henderson and Cavallari’s husband Jay Cutler were having an affair. Henderson, a celebrity stylist and glam specialist, was a major part of seasons 1 and 2, and some fans on social media had begun speculating that something was going on between her and Cutler, 36.

“The biggest change in my personal life is that my best friend Kelly and I haven’t talked in two months,” Cavallari said in a confessional. “We’ve had a major falling out and it’s just been breaking my heart.”

Kristin Cavallari and Kelly Henderson
Kristin Cavallari/Instagram

“When season 2 was airing, there was a lot of talk on social media about Jay and Kelly having an affair,” she continued. “Not for one second have I ever thought that it was true. It wasn’t the actual accusations of them having an affair that made me upset, it was how Kelly went about it.”

According to Cavallari, Henderson “kept talking about Jay on social media,” which was only “adding fuel to the fire.”

“I kept trying to reach out to her and talk to her about it and tell her how I was feeling, and instead of her just owning her side of it and being like, ‘I’m sorry. Oh my god, that was never my intention,’ or whatever, she kept giving me pushback and would get really defensive,” Cavallari said. “And then she literally just stopped responding to me. That, to me, is such a slap in the face. You don’t care? Good to know.”

The Uncommon James owner got together with two other close friends, colorist Justin Anderson and corporate consultant Stephanie “Biegs” Biegel, to fill them in on what was going on.

“I literally haven’t talked to Kelly at all — honestly, probably two times in the last six months and it’s only been about the show,” Cavallari told them. “She was accused of having an affair with Jay last season of the show, which, fine, I get it — that’s a lot for her to deal with, too.”

“But she wanted to post something about it. I was like, ‘Don’t post anything about it! That’s the last thing you do,’ ” she continued. “Why do you want to post about that? To get more attention about it. If I was accused of having an affair with your husband, I wouldn’t say his f—ing name on social media. Like, like come on! It kind of blows my mind.”

Cavallari told Anderson and Biegel that she had sent Henderson an email, which wasn’t well received.

“I was like, ‘Here’s how your actions have affected me.’ And she wrote me back and she was really defensive,” Cavallari said. “The point is I feel very used. I care way too much about her to just be like, ‘Oh, f— her,’ or whatever. But I’m not willing to just let it go. And I don’t know if I’m ready to just move on from it.”

She also sat down with Cutler to discuss the situation, admitting it had left her “emotionally drained.” He suggested his wife “take a little bit of time and space,” then meet with Henderson to try to smooth things over. Cavallari agreed and said she hoped they could “come back around.”

During an episode of the Comments By Celebs podcast, which dropped Monday, Cavallari further discussed the state of her friendship with Henderson and how the storyline will play out throughout the show’s third season.

“Season 3 is definitely very emotional and for different reasons throughout the whole season. The season starts off and you see … this downfall that I have with a girlfriend. It was heartbreaking at the time and it’s heartbreaking for me to go back now and almost relive it. So that’s been tough,” she said about what fans can expect to see.

Cavallari shared that “it definitely unfolds throughout the season and you will see where we are” and that fans are “along for the ride on the show.”

“Her scene with Justin, I was dying to see that scene. Obviously, I heard about it, everyone told me about it. But then actually seeing it, it was like, ‘F—,’ ” said Cavallari, who added, “This is what I’m really going through. This was really one of my best friends. This is all very real and that’s the hard part is just seeing how she was in this scene. It killed me, it just did.”

While Cavallari, who is an executive producer on the show, was hurt by Henderson’s actions, she still wanted her best friend’s side of the story to air. “Her side should be shown. I want her to speak her piece, she was such a large part of the show too,” she said.

Kristin Cavallari and Jay Cutler
Kristin Cavallari/Instagram

The mother of three — she shares Camden, 7, Jaxon, 4, and Saylor, 4, with Cutler — also shared that she “would never just want to bash Kelly.”

“This was one of my best friends, like I said. And I actually started this season not talking about it because I didn’t know where we stood, I didn’t know what was going to happen. And again, I just didn’t want to put all of that out there. Obviously, it had to have been addressed because she was such a large part of the show. I actually texted her … after I had my first conversation about it on the show, I said, ‘Hey, I just want to let you know I started talking about our situation on the show, just a head’s up I wanted you to hear it from me.’ … And she just didn’t respond. And then she went to film. I was like, okay, I guess we’re talking about it. So that was kind of what happened,” she said on the podcast.

RELATED VIDEO: Kristin Cavallari On How She Keeps Her Priorities Straight While Filming: ‘Structure & Routine’

The reality star further explained that she never wants “anyone to hate Kelly or anything like that. It’s not like that. It’s just this is what I was going through, I’m filming a reality show and, you know, Kelly and I even in season 2 talked about we have to put what we’re really going through out there, that’s the whole point of doing a show. That’s what the audience connects to. It’s like, well, here we are. This is what’s going on in my life and when I wasn’t talking about it, I felt like I had nothing to say when we were filming because the biggest thing in my life was hanging over my head, but I wasn’t talking about it. … It is what it is. I’m the kind of person, I’m all in. If I’m going to do a reality show, then let’s do it.”

While Henderson has not directly addressed the feud, a sneak peek at the rest of the season teased an emotional sit-down between the two women. On Thursday, Henderson did appear to acknowledge the drama with a cryptic Instagram post that read, “Take a deep breath and remember who the f— you are.”