March 29, 2018 11:04 AM

Even though Kendra Wilkinson Baskett decided to stay with her husband Hank Baskett after he allegedly had an affair in 2014, the cheating scandal changed the dynamic of their relationship.

“Kendra was devastated,” a source tells PEOPLE amid news that a split between the couple, who have been married for nine years but are no longer wearing their wedding rings, is imminent.

In 2014, Hank, 35, allegedly had an affair with a transgender model while Kendra, 32, was eight months pregnant with daughter Alijah, now 3. The couple also have an 8-year-old son, Hank IV.

“I messed up,” Baskett told PEOPLE of the encounter, which was in part caused by drug use. “I put myself in a bad situation. And everything through me brought pain upon this family.”

“At first she was just confused and had a lot of questions and went through an extreme rollercoaster of emotions. It didn’t matter who it was. All that mattered was that he was unfaithful to her and to their family,” the source explains, adding that Kendra “was totally blindsided and she never thought in a million years Hank could make a decision that would hurt her so deeply.”

The source continues, “Even though she decided she was going to stand by her man their marriage was definitely forever impacted by his cheating.”

Kendra Wilkinson Baskett and Hank Baskett
Isaac Brekken/Getty

RELATED: Kendra Wilkinson & Hank Baskett Are Preparing to Separate: ‘She Realized There’s No Turning Back’

Despite the shock and hurt that came with the scandal, the source says Kendra ultimately decided to stay with her husband because “she truly believes in marriage.”

“She didn’t just stay with him for the kids. She truly believes in marriage and wanted to make it work at the time and believed they could get through it and come out stronger,” the source explains.

“He swore and promised full transparency with her. He allowed her access to his phone, his emails and also promised to go to therapy,” the source adds.

Adds another insider, “Kendra is devastated by what’s going on right now. She never dreamed when she married Hank that they wouldn’t have a solid marriage forever. The incident really shook them. She tried so hard to get over it, but the reminders were everywhere. Hank has a really good heart and he beat himself up over what happened. At one point, it seemed like things were totally back on track. But now they’re both so unhappy.”

Kendra Wilkinson Baskett and Hank Baskett with kids Alijah and Hank IV
Ari Perilstein/Getty

A source close to the Kendra on Top star previously told PEOPLE that while Kendra, who admitted in February to having “marital problems” with Hank, never saw herself as the type to get a divorce, the couple have been “having a really tough time, especially over the last three to six months.”

“She’s always been someone who wanted to be fully committed, married forever, and was definitely a ‘I’ll never get a divorce’ kind of girl, but she really lost trust in her marriage and she’s realized there’s no turning back,” the source said, adding that the couple had also grown apart while Kendra was in Las Vegas starring in the Off-Broadway comedy, Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man.

RELATED VIDEO: Kendra Wilkinson, Hank Baskett Forego Wedding Rings Amid Split Rumors: ‘It’s Not Good,’ Says Source

As Kendra and Hank navigate the possibility of a split, the pair are remaining focused on the wellbeing of their kids.

“They’re still talking, but it’s mostly for the kids. It’s really important to both of them that they don’t traumatize the kids,” the source remarked. “They’re going to try their best to have a graceful separation.”

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