Kate Gosselin divorced her husband of 10 years in 2009 amid rumors of infidelity

By Aurelie Corinthios
July 01, 2019 01:02 PM
Advertisement

Kate Gosselin is looking back on her high-profile divorce.

In PEOPLE’s exclusive sneak peek at Monday’s episode of Kate Plus Date on TLC, Kate, 44, admits that while she can’t explicitly discuss the details of her split from Jon Gosselin, the breakup definitely affected the way she has approached relationships since. (She divorced her husband of 10 years in 2009 amid rumors of infidelity. The two share 15-year-old sextuplets Hannah, Leah, Alexis, Joel, Aaden and Collin, and 18-year-old twins Mady and Cara.)

“One thing I noticed is that you’re creating this barrier around yourself,” the matchmaker says. “You’re not sharing anything that may not be perfect.”

“You aren’t aware, nobody is aware, of really what my life entails,” Kate says. “It scares a lot of people. A lot of babysitters, a lot of relatives, literally have walked away because it’s too much pressure.”

“I know that there’s this part of my life that I’m unable to talk about,” she continues. “A) obviously I’m divorced, and B) it hasn’t been pleasant. There’s just so much surrounding that that I’m unable — and, for my kids’ sake, unwilling — to talk about.”

In an interview with producers, Mady says her mom has developed “trust issues.”

“Everything that she’s been through has really created a lot of trust issues,” she says. “But she is doing this [show] and she wants to be happy and that comes with some sacrifices. Like, if she has to suck it up and get started before she feels comfortable, she’s going to have to do it.”

The matchmaker is on the same page and points out to Kate that she tends to communicate the fact that her past relationship is an off-limits topic, thus alienating any potential partners, on the very first date.

“For him to reaffirm, ‘Yes, this is what you’re doing,’ it causes people to think, ‘Is she being dishonest, evasive?’ ” Kate says. “I don’t want to do that because it just speaks to me not being genuine and real, which is not the case at all.”

Diving deeper, the matchmaker asks Kate if she’s “been burned, since your ex, in love.”

“I haven’t been in love ever since — well, like, at all,” Kate says.

So has how she views love changed at all?

“No, my view of people has changed,” she explains. “Not love, because I know my grandparents’ love exists. It existed once and it can exist again. That’s the only example I can give you that I experienced personally, but I think very much my view of people changed. It really probably was the heart of my trust issues in terms of, ‘Are you just telling me that because I want to hear it, or is that who you are?’ ”

Speaking to PEOPLE Now earlier this month, the TLC star said she’s careful about who she lets into her life.

“I used to look for qualities that I liked as a person, but now I have to look for qualities that we all like,” she said of her and her kids.

“It’s not a secret I went through a very public divorce,” she added. “That wasn’t pleasant. I feel like for that very reason, I am very guarded, and I don’t tend to trust people. I don’t think that’s a bad thing. I certainly don’t want to rush into another relationship. The pressure is on for it to be positive and successful for all of our sakes.”

Kate Plus Date airs Mondays (10 p.m. ET) on TLC.