Everything Erika Girardi Has Said About Her Divorce from Estranged Husband Tom Girardi

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star filed for divorce from her husband on Nov. 3, 2020 after 21 years of marriage — and amid some legal drama. Look back on everything she's said about their relationship in season 11 of the show

01 of 21
Erika Girardi
Erika Girardi. Amy Sussman/Getty

"Based on Tom's two previous divorces, he's a fighting mother f----- until the end. If I got a Bentley out of this divorce, I'd be thrilled."

— during a confessional (read up on the history of their legal drama here)

02 of 21
Erika and Tom Girardi
Erika and Tom Girardi. Jerritt Clark/Getty; Steve Eichner/Sipa

"What is there to say? I'm sure he's very mad at me."

— to costar Sutton Strackle when asked if she and Tom had spoken to each other after she filed for divorce

03 of 21
Erika Jayne as "Roxie Hart" poses backstage after making her broadway debut in the hit musical "Chicago" on Broadway at The Ambassador Theater on January 6, 2020 in New York City
Bruce Glikas/WireImage

"Your wife that you have supported and funded becomes a lead on Broadway, and you don't come to the show? And then I had to go out there and defend it. Now you tell me if I feel loved."

— during a confessional, revealing how she felt when she told her costars that Tom did not attend her Broadway debut as Roxie Hart in the Tony-winning revival of Chicago the Musical

04 of 21
Erika Girardi
Erika Girardi. John Tsiavis/Bravo

"My life drastically changed this week. I let go of my Lamborghini, I let go of my 16,000-square-foot home, I let go of my marriage — I let go of everything. I literally made a decision that I had to."

— to her RHOBH costars about her filing for divorce

05 of 21
Erika and Tom Girardi
Erika and Tom Girardi. Bravo

"I left because he pushed me further and further out. The conversations that I used to have were now reduced down to a sentence or two. I just kept walking around that house and knowing that this marriage was headed down a really s----- path, I had to make a choice to do what was right for me. I couldn't live that way anymore."

— during a confessional

06 of 21
Erika Girardi and Thomas Girardi
Erika and Tom Girardi. Steve Eichner/AP

"I didn't want to do that and that's the truth. It also doesn't serve me to talk a lot about what is happening legally or will happen legally because I am married to somebody who's very good in that area."

— to her costars, explaining why she did not tell them about the divorce news prior to her filing because it would have put them "in a bad position"

07 of 21
Erika Jayne
Amy Sussman/Getty

"I cried every day. This was the end of a massive part of my life, stepping into basically a void."

— to the ladies, as she opened up about her decision to file

08 of 21

"After finding a place to go to, I dropped him off at work and I went home and moved out. I was out within the day. It's frightening, you know, when you think about it."

— during a confessional

09 of 21
Erika and Tom Girardi
Tom and Erika Girardi. Bravo

"There's always that underlying pressure of wanting to please someone that's provided for you. And I felt always that I should shut up and be grateful to an extent."

— to the ladies, explaining why she felt conflicted before making her decision to leave her marriage

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"I drove him to work and I told him I loved him. And he said, 'Thanks, hun,' like I was an employee." ...

"I went home and started putting everything in the moving van. I drove off, went to my new place, spent the night there and he was served the next morning."

— to costar Lisa Rinna, detailing the events that transpired before she served Tom divorce papers

11 of 21

"Ever wanna tweet your real feelings but you can't? That's me."

on Twitter

12 of 21
erika girardi
Paul Archuleta/Getty Images

"Divorce is very painful and then having it called a sham is even more painful. It took a lot of courage to leave and it took two seconds for some ass---- to say it was a sham and [for] everybody to believe it."

— during a confessional

13 of 21
erika girardi
Leon Bennett/WireImage

"I wake up every morning and I think about what I need to tackle on a legal front every day. It's just one of those things." ...

"I didn't do this."

— to costars Kyle Richards and Lisa Rinna, regarding the allegations that her divorce was a "sham" so she could hide assets

14 of 21
erika girardi
Arturo Holmes/WireImage

"People think that Erica Jayne brought down Tom Girardi. Tom Girardi brought down Tom Girardi. I don't want his actions to absolutely kill what I have created. I fear starting over. The only thing I have is my name and the hope that this is not where this ends for me."

— during a confessional

15 of 21
erika girardi
Frazer Harrison/Getty Images

"It is really unenviable. Being the possible target of the Federal Criminal Investigation is, like, not cool. To have all those things said about you, which are not true. And then to have everyone, basically, question everything is lonely and it's quiet. And you would be shocked at how quickly people turn on you, how quickly people distance themselves from you. Automatically, they turn because they don't want to be involved. They were there when it was good though."

— to costar Kyle Richards

16 of 21
erika girardi
Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images

"Tom is a proud man. One of the reasons that I filed for divorce is the resistance to anything. The resistance to a conversation, the resistance to, 'Hey, you know, I've noticed that you can't see well.' 'What are you talking about? I'm fine.' 'No, you can't see well, you can't hear. You're f------ degrading in front of me, and you're ignoring it.'" ...

"Tom is in the place that he's in, which is his own personal hell, and I cannot help him. I cannot help him. This is the end. It's not the end that anyone wants because it's torture to see someone just melt."

— to costar Kyle Richards, on hoping someone was checking on Tom because he was "not good" amid the legal trouble and she had not been in contact with him since their split

17 of 21

"No merit
No investigation
No proof
Just more harassment …"

on Twitter

18 of 21

"This was a long time coming. This was a long battle with someone whose personality has completely changed. Three years ago, he had a terrible, terrible head injury. And there was a significant shift in his personality, his decision-making and who he is. There was [a] severe decline and it comes down to simple things like, there was no conversation. The conversations that I used to have with him, the back and forth, was no longer. The repetitive phrases, the forgetting what we were talking about." ...

"I would hear the same story 10 times in one day and if you said, 'Oh, I remember that,' [there would be] rage [from him]. Like, I was a whipping boy. ... He would lay out on me, anything. It was the anger, the frustration. I took it all."

to costars Garcelle Beauvais and Crystal Minkoff on Tom's declining health

19 of 21

"I think what has happened to Tom here is that he's not mentally capable, and he's in sole control of his firm. And I think that it got away from him. I think that we're dealing with a man who is [at a] diminished capacity in control, and not doing the right thing. Because if he stole the money, I'd like to know where it is. You know, that's the truth."

— to her costars, regarding the lawsuits Tom is facing

20 of 21

"There's going to be a day when all of this is behind me, and it's going to be a very sweet day. I'm going to remember those who were with me, and I'm going to remember those who were against me. Trust me."

— to her costars during Kathy Hilton's dinner party

21 of 21

"No I will not. Never."

— to TMZ on Nov. 14, when asked if she would ever get married again

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