'It's Like a Hot Bikram Yoga Class in Here:' The 10 Best Jokes You Might Have Missed at the 2019 Emmys
Anthony Anderson Steals Emmys with His Mom
"Oh God, I'm so deserving of this! … Mom, how big is your purse?"
— helping his mom load statuettes into her bag during the host-less ceremony opening
Alex Borstein on the Los Angeles Heat Inside the Microsoft Theater
"I know a lot of people were upset last year because I wasn't wearing a bra. Tonight, I want to apologize because I'm not wearing any underwear. You're going to want to just throw that chair out, or clean it pretty good. It looks pretty on TV, but it's like a hot Bikram yoga class in here, a lot of nervous women."
— while accepting the Emmy for supporting actress in a comedy series for The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
Bob Newhart Confirms that He is, in Fact, Not Dead
"You put me with George and Lucy and it's weird. Like I was in some weird museum of comedy … I hated you, by the way, in Tropic Thunder."
— to co-presenter Ben Stiller, in a bit that included wax statues of George Burns and Lucille Ball
Phoebe Waller-Bridge Reveals What Writing & Acting Are All About
"I find writing really, really hard and really painful. But I'd like to say, honestly from the bottom of my heart, that the reason I do it is this. So it's made it all really worth it guys, thank you so much!"
"Thank you. I find acting really hard and really painful. But it's all about this."
— while accepting outstanding writing for a comedy series for Fleabag, and later outstanding lead actress in a comedy series for the same show
Former Emmys Hosts Stephen Colbert & Jimmy Kimmel on the Importance of Hosts
Kimmel: "Without a host, who would sit behind a desk and pretend to be interested in Jason Bateman's vacation stories?"
Colbert: "Oh, you swam with dolphins? How fascinating."
Kimmel: "He told that one on your show, too?!"
— before presenting outstanding actress in a comedy series
Amy Poehler and Catherine O'Hara on the Most Important Qualities in Nominees
O'Hara: "These are the qualities we look for in our personal trainers."
Poehler: "And they are also the words we use to describe our eight nominees' lower-back tattoos."
— before presenting the award for outstanding supporting actress in a comedy series
John Oliver Thanks Game of Thrones for Airing Before His Show
"Thank you to Game of Thrones for the lead-in over the years. It's been amazing, it's been really great. It's been so fun working out how to lose your audience each week. Municipal tax districts really shook them off."
— accepting the award for outstanding variety talk series for Last Week Tonight
Julia Louis-Dreyfus Laments Having to Share the Stage
"I'm sorry, I was told I would be up here alone, you know, to celebrate the show Veep because that is me. I was the Veep."
— presenting a farewell to the series with her costars
Phoebe Waller-Bridge & Bill Hader on Why Some Shows Are Meant to Be Limited
Waller-Bridge: "Some of these shows are just a bit too much."
Hader: "Doesn't matter how good the show is, no one really wants to see seven seasons of Chernobyl."
— explaining what a limited series is before presenting best supporting actor in a limited series to Ben Whishaw
Tony Shalhoub Thanks Amy Sherman-Palladino and Daniel Palladino … and Amy Sherman-Palladino and Daniel Palladino
"My thanks to our show's creators, Amy Sherman-Palladino and Daniel Palladino, our executive producers, the illustrious husband and wife team of Amy and Dan Palladino, our amazing writers led by — Oh God, I can barely read my own writing — oh yeah, Amy Sherman-Palladino and her writing partner — Danny or Donny, is it Donny or Danny — doesn't matter, you know who you are. And, of course, our directors Dan and Amy Palladino — yikes, I hope I'm pronouncing that correctly. And, on a personal note, just a special shout-out to my dear friends Amy and Dan for their love and support.
— accepting outstanding supporting actor in a comedy series for The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel