Countdown to The Real Housewives of Atlanta Wig Out
Thursday night’s episode seemed to be one long march toward the crescendo that will be next week’s wig-pull — the moment when Sheree lunges for Kim‘s flaxen hairpiece and commits the ultimate sign of housewife disrespect. Here, we count down the most memorable moments leading up to Atlanta’s version of the table flip:
5. Kim’s styling session: Reviled as Kim is by her fellow Housewives for being, as Lisa put it, “a habitual liar,” the wigged one is aces at acting outrageous and being entertaining. When modeling custom ‘gowns’ with Newport in hand and explaining to her entourage, “Those boxes are just Dolce & Gabbana sending me s—- from L.A. all day long. I will shovel s–– for Dolce & Gabbana” or rotating in front of her bedroom mirror because “This is not the boob I like,” you can practically feel the ratings spike.
4. Kandi‘s mama drama: This season’s heart is proving to be Kandi, who takes the painful fact that her mother disapproves of her fiance AJ (and his multiple baby mamas) and turns it into song. Let’s just hope her forthcoming album, B.L.O.G. (an acronym for “B–-hes Love Online Gossip”), is as delicious as her Aunt Bertha.
3. Let’s go make babies: Contrived “love scene” though it was, Lisa Wu Hartwell and her hot husband Ed took the by-now typical ‘Housewife struggles with fertility issues’ story arc to the next level, by taking us inside the bubble bath. When ex-NFL linebacker Ed informed us “I’ve had a talk with my soldiers, and they’re ready to go to war,” we bought it. Yes sir, we did.
2. B––h with a gun: Who but Sheree could learn to fire a weapon in leather pants, studded Louboutins and under the tutelage of fellow sexy divorcee Tania, a Gulf War veteran with Halle Berry‘s bone structure? Anthony the party planner: Be afraid. Be very afraid.
1. Kim and Nene — Before the Fall: When, after several Patron Margaritas, Kim jiggled onto Nene’s lap and they giggled over their “bubbies,” it became clear that these two share a genuine, boozy bond.
Which sets up this cliffhanger: Whose side do you think Nene will be on when Kim and Sheree finally take it outside? — Suzanne Zuckerman