The former Bachelor revealed that he is gay in an April 14 interview on Good Morning America

By Aili Nahas
April 21, 2021 06:13 PM
colton underwood
Colton Underwood
| Credit: Jon Kopaloff/Getty

One week after Colton Underwood gave a bombshell interview revealing that he is gay, the former Bachelor is breathing more easily.

"Colton is relieved and happy that the interview is out," a source of Underwood, 29, tells PEOPLE. "He's happy that the interview is out and that everyone knows the truth."

Opening up about the truth has been a long time coming for the former football player, who told ABC's Robin Roberts that he had struggled internally with his sexuality since he was a child.

"I've known that I was different since the age of 6," Underwood said. "And I couldn't process it and I couldn't put my finger on what it was until my freshman year of high school when I knew I was gay."

Still, Underwood said he continued to run from his own truth, eventually starring on The Bachelorette and then The Bachelor in 2019, when he ended up with his pick, Cassie Randolph, for over a year and a half.

After painful years concealing his true self, including navigating suicidal thoughts, Underwood said, "I came to terms with [being gay] earlier this year and I've been processing it."

Now, as Underwood can finally live out his authentic life, he is also contending with a messy split from Randolph, 25, who filed for a restraining order after their breakup last spring, alleging that he harassed and stalked her. (Last November, Underwood confirmed that he and Randolph had come to a private agreement.)

colton underwood and cassie randolph
Colton Underwood and Cassie Randolph
| Credit: Amy Sussman/Getty

For more on Cassie Randolph and Colton Underwood, pick up the latest issue of PEOPLE, on newsstands Friday, or subscribe here.

"It's complicated," says the source of the relationship. "But Colton loved Cassie very much."

Though he said they haven't spoken, Underwood apologized to Randolph in his interview, telling Roberts, "I would like to say sorry for how things ended. I made a lot of bad choices."

Ultimately, "Colton is focused on the future," says the source. "He wants the best for everyone and he's ready to move on."