'Bachelorette' 's Clare Crawley Reflects on 'Messy' Breakup with Dale Moss: 'He Knows the Truth'

Clare Crawley and Dale Moss split for a second time last month, a source told PEOPLE at the time

Clare Crawley is opening up more about her "painful" breakup with Dale Moss.

Crawley, 40, and Moss, 33, met on her season of The Bachelorette, which aired last year. Though they left the ABC series as an engaged couple just two weeks in, the pair called it quits in January. They then rekindled their relationship, but split again in September, an insider told PEOPLE at the time.

Crawley appeared on Thursday's episode of Jana Kramer's podcast, Whine Down, and revealed whether she has any regrets from her time as the Bachelorette.

"My biggest regret is trusting the process, trusting a man — a man's words and who he showed me he was," she said. "I don't think that that's a regret, like, I trusted somebody, I believed somebody that they were who they said they were or that they would hold up to the promises that they make when they get down on one knee."

She continued, "I don't know if that's a regret, I loved, and have always had such a deep love for, Dale, and A) he doesn't go away overnight and B) I don't regret that I loved loving him."

Clare Crawley, Dale Moss
Clare Crawley, Dale Moss. Craig Sjodin/ABC via Getty Images; Roy Rochlin/WireImage

The reality star went on to address the former couple's very public breakup, which came amid rumors that Moss was somehow involved with fellow franchise star Abigail Heringer. Following the split, Moss issued a statement via his rep claiming that Crawley had blocked him on social media.

"It can get very messy and very icky, and I always try to err on the side of taking the high road, even when there are a lot of things I could say," Crawley told Kramer, 37. "I wish people knew both sides, you know, because it's easy for a publicist or a source to put out a narrative of what they want their client or friend to look like and appear to, especially when your career is based, and dreams are based, on being in the public eye. But things are hurtful and I'm human, so it does affect me."

"It's very impersonal to be putting out statements and articles," she added. "I think you both know the truth. I know the truth, he knows the truth. You know what happens behind closed doors, and when you know the truth, we know where your heart is, like, I don't need a publicist speaking my side of the story. I don't care for my side of the story, to be honest, to even be out there — even if I have receipts and proof, everything I need to show that I could really put it out there."

"I think it just seems icky," she said. "I think it seems icky when it's like, 'sources say,' 'the publicist says this,' it's just, why not talk to the person directly?"

Dale Moss and Clare Crawley
Dale Moss and Clare Crawley. Craig Sjodin/ABC

Crawley said the breakup was particularly hard given that she was still recovering her breast implants removal surgery and trying to support her mother, who has dementia and Alzheimer's.

"There was a lot on my plate," she said, sharing that "it all came crashing down at once."

She also said it was "painful" to not be able to sit down with Moss and get closure on their relationship.

"It's painful when you feel like somebody who you love deeply doesn't even have enough respect to take you to sit down and have a very vulnerable conversation and owning your stuff on both sides, you know, and just having a conversation," Crawley said. "It's hurtful because it's like, 'You think that little of me?' But yet he supposedly loved me … Maybe that is the closure."

"The one that gets me is, how do you say goodbye to somebody you never wanted to walk away from?" she later added through tears. "Like I would have never walked... You're having to say goodbye to somebody you don't want to be saying goodbye to, you have to walk away from somebody you don't want to walk away from. It's hard, it's painful."

Never miss a story — sign up for PEOPLE's free daily newsletter to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from juicy celebrity news to compelling human interest stories.

Moving forward, Crawley said in future relationships she will "gladly hold the door" for a partner who wants to leave.

"It's exhausting to keep putting out energy and giving energy and feeding energy to somebody who's not giving you that return," she said.

As for her comeback game? "It's my biggest flex, my comeback game," she said.

"The things that have been the most challenging in my life are what propelled me to be the strongest woman that I am," she said. "That's where I dig deep and it hurts, and it's painful to go through those things, but that's where I source my strength. … I refuse to give up on myself, because I know my worth, and I know what I bring to the table."

Related Articles