Caitlyn Jenner's Incredible Journey: In Her Own Words
The reality star made her debut on the cover of Vanity Fair
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After making her world debut, Caitlyn Jenner is sharing intimate details about her transition, her family and her glamorous Vanity Fair cover shoot.
But it’s been a long road for the 65-year-old.
” ‘I don’t want to be this way’ was the bottom line. Who would want to be dealing with all these issues,” she tells Vanity Fair. “I look at men and say, ‘Oh my God, would it not be so wonderful to be comfortable in your own skin, male or female, so when you wake up in the morning you get dressed and go to work and this identity issue is not even present?’
“You’re happy being who you are. You have a beautiful wife and this and that. … I look at women and think the exact same thing: ‘Wouldn’t it be wonderful to wake up in the morning and be able to get dressed and go out and live your life?’ ”
She will begin living her public life July 15, when she’ll accept the Arthur Ashe Courage Award at ESPN’s ESPYs in Los Angeles. All 10 of her Kardashian and Jenner children will be by her side, according to Vanity Fair.
Below, hear about Jenner’s journey in her own words to the magazine:
On Her Surgeries
• Jenner, who has taken hormones and undergone operations on her face and breasts, has not had surgery on her genitals. She second-guessed her facial-feminization surgery after a painful, 10-hour surgery and suffered a panic attack – but overcame it with the help of a counselor: “If I was lying on my deathbed and I had kept this secret and never ever did anything about it, I would be lying there saying, ‘You just blew your entire life. You never dealt with yourself,’ and I don’t want that to happen.”
On the Photo Shoot
• After posing for her last portrait, Jenner began to cry, touching her Olympic gold medal: “That was good. But the last couple of days were better.
On Her Children
• “I have made a lot of mistakes raising the four Jenner kids. I had times not only dealing with my own issues but exes. [It was] very traumatic and there was a lot of turmoil in my life, and I wasn’t as close to my kids as I should have been.”
• Jenner at first felt “terribly disappointed and terribly hurt” that her four older kids refuse to be a part of the show but has come to terms with it: “I think it’s better for the show right now. It keeps me on point and doesn’t distract with all the family issues.”
On Her Docuseries
• “I’m not doing it for money. I’m doing it to help my soul and help other people. If I can make a dollar, I certainly am not stupid. [I have] house payments and all that kind of stuff. I will never make an excuse for something like that. Yeah, this is a business. You don’t go out and change your gender for a television show. Okay, it ain’t happening. I don’t care who you are. It ain’t happening, okay? You don’t do it.”