"I always cry at the thought that he’ll never meet his great-grandbabies," the former Bachelor contestant shared on Instagram Wednesday

By Ashley Boucher
July 29, 2020 11:14 PM
Bekah Martinez and her late grandfather
Bekah Martinez/instagram

Bekah Martinez is opening up about a tragic moment from her past.

The former Bachelor star, 25, shared on Instagram Wednesday that her grandfather was murdered when he was 59 and she was a teenager.

"My grandfather (Papa) was indigenous american and would collect traditional baskets and other items like this cradle board. He even taught himself how to weave, and we still have some of his half-finished projects," Martinez wrote alongside a photo of her son Franklin James, who she and boyfriend Grayston Leonard welcomed last month.

Martinez and Leonard also have a daughter, Ruth Ray De La Luz, 17 months.

"I’ve rarely talked about him publicly," the mother of two shared. "We were extremely close and he was murdered when I was 17. He was only 59."

The reality star said her late grandpa was a "dreamer and a doer; a maker, an artist."

"He taught me how to bake Challah bread. Flowers came alive in his hands; he was a master florist. He built a home in the mountains with his own two hands," she said.

Martinez said that she and her grandpa were very close and that one of the hardest parts of his death means that he won't be able to meet Ruth and Franklin.

"All of the memories with my Papa are the happiest and most magical, but I always cry at the thought that he’ll never meet his great-grandbabies. He would have loved to see Franklin like this."

Bekah Martinez
Bekah Martinez/instagram

"One of the hardest parts of losing someone is losing all the years you expected to have with them. You feel robbed of memories that should have been. And grief isn’t linear. Sometimes 8 years feels like a lifetime, and other days like today, it feels like no time at all."

On her Instagram Story, Martinez shared a selfie of herself wearing a long beaded necklace — which she revealed her grandfather had made.

Sharing her outfit details, she wrote atop the snap, "vintage camisole, gold necklaces from etsy, and turquoise necklace hand-strung by my grandpa."

Earlier this month, Martinez shared photos from her home birth with Franklin, revealing that the tot "didn't even cry."

She also shared how little Ruth is adjusting to her new role as big sister.

"When I'm around, she kisses his forehead and is so sweet," Martinez said. "I walk into the kitchen the other day to go get something and I walk back into the living room and she's standing over his swing hitting him as hard as she can — like straight-up arm-above-the-head whacking, in full force."

"So that's another thing," she said. "I have to be his protector and protect him from Ruth trying to murder him."