"It has everything to do with me being uncomfortable with being gay around people," Demi Burnett said on Monday's Bachelor in Paradise
After dumping Caelynn Miller-Keyes on her birthday earlier this season, Dean came back to reveal that he had a change of heart and wanted Caelynn to leave the beach with him. But Caelynn connected with Connor Saeli in Dean’s absence, so she felt torn about whether to stay or go, though Connor made it clear that he wanted her to remain in paradise with him.
“I feel like I can definitely see a future outside of this with you,” he told Caelynn. “I don’t want you to leave. I don’t want it to be over.”
Connor added that he didn’t think Dean had changed — as Dean assured her, “I’m a changed man.”
“I’m scared of getting hurt again,” Caelynn told Dean.
“I can’t tell you exactly what’s going to happen next, but I know I want to try,” Dean said.
Caelynn accepted his offer, admitting, “It feels wrong.”
Connor felt devastated and contemplated leaving the show until he scored a date with newcomer Revian Chang from Colton Underwood’s season of The Bachelor. “Cheers to an amazing day,” he said over champagne during their date. “Thanks to you for helping me feel better.”
“I’m Just Scared”
A few other couples struggled, though. Demi Burnett scored a date card and used it to ask out Kristian Haggerty. Demi took the opportunity to confront Kristian about acting flirty with other women in the cast.
“I feel like she’s more interested in them than me,” Demi confessed in an on-camera interview. “It’s just getting to me. Like, I can’t. I can’t watch it. I don’t want to see that.”
Demi worried that Kristian’s tendency to get physical with other women stemmed from Demi’s own aversion to PDA.
“I feel like I’m not giving her enough, but I’m also struggling with my inner battle of being worried about how I’m making other people feel, which shouldn’t matter, but it does,” Demi said. “I hate that my brain works that way but I’m just scared. It has everything to do with me being uncomfortable with being gay around people … being gay around all these people who thought I was some straight girl. It’s scary.”
She continued, “I’m getting comfortable with it, but it’s taking me some time. I feel so guilty because I feel bad for it taking time and I want to give her what she needs but I’m still uncomfortable with it because I don’t want people to be like, ‘That’s weird.’ I don’t want people to stare and be like, ‘Oh my God, you’re kissing.’ It’s just stressing me out and I’m trying not to be so concerned about myself and trying to think about her.”
Kristian assured Demi that the way she acted towards other women on the beach wasn’t intended to be romantic.
“I’m so physical with all of my friends,” Kristian explained. “It’s just, I don’t see it as flirting in my eyes because here’s no flirt intention behind whoever I touched today or whatever bothered you today.”
Kristian also understood the initial discomfort that came with coming out, and assured Demi, “It doesn’t change how I feel about you.”
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Blake’s Last Attempt at Love
“I have allowed myself to think about Kristina as being the mother of my children and as being my wife,” Blake said in an on-camera interview. “There’s something undeniable between us. We can’t deny each other anymore. We can’t deny the feelings that we have.”
To reconnect with Kristina, Blake made his own date card for the two of them. “Her heart does know that I’m the one for her,” he told the cameras. “I’m taking matters into my own hands.”
But as soon as their romantic evening began, it came to an end.
“I don’t think I’ll be able to get where I need to get,” Kristina told Blake. “I can’t get there if I’m being real. It would’ve been very misleading of me to continue these things. I’m sorry.”
“I did not expect this to go this way,” Blake said.
When Kristina rejoined the group on the sand, she announced that she was leaving Paradise. Then Blake shared the same sentiment with Clay Harbor. “Paradise just isn’t for me,” he told Clay.
In the van on his way home, Blake wondered if maybe his Paradise ending resulted from the tangled web of love he wove earlier in the season with Kristina, Caelynn, Hannah Goodwin and Tayshia Adams (who went to an oceanfront, DIY prom courtesy of John Paul Jones during Monday’s episode).
“Part of me thinks I deserve this,” Blake said. “This is karma, you know?”
Bachelor in Paradise continues on Tuesday at 8 p.m. ET on ABC.