By People Staff
Updated December 01, 2020 04:10 PM
Credit: Bob D'Amico/ABC

Each week, Ali Fedotowsky is sharing her thoughts about new episodes of The Bachelorette. You re going to see me get mad, cry, be happy, stressed out, she says of her season. After saying goodbye to Ty in Porto, Portugal, Ali writes in about her hometown dates and meeting the families of her four remaining suitors:

I want to start off by addressing a few of the comments on last week’s blog (yes, I read them, and thanks for all of the support. I appreciate every word). It seems as though many of you question whether or not I am serious about finding a husband. I don t really know how to respond to this other than to ask all of you to have faith in me. I am doing my absolute best to make decisions that are right for me and the guys. I am just a normal person, like all of you, that’s trying to find love.

Now onto this week s episode! I was glad to be back in the U.S. and moving onto hometowns. Don’t get me wrong, I loved traveling. But I missed the little things about home and I was glad to be back after being away for so long. I also need to comment on how many times I said “amazing” in this episode! (Jimmy Kimmel, I know you are going to get a kick out of the count this week). Let’s just say it really was an AMAZING week :). Now let’s talk about these dates:

I had the best time on my baseball date with Roberto. We played in the park for a couple of hours and loved every minute of it! I know I say it every episode, but how hot is Roberto?! Especially in that baseball uniform … I am one lucky girl! I was so thrilled when he gave me his Steeple Cats baseball card. The Steeple Cats are a baseball team in the town next to my hometown. How crazy is it that Roberto and I were in the same town in the summer of 2002 when he played for them?!?! Another fun thing about the baseball card is that it has the name of my local newspaper on the back – the North Adams Transcript. It reminded me of all the clippings my mom has kept of me playing soccer from the newspaper over the years.

Roberto’s dad asked me about personal goals and how I would balance that with his son’s goals. I am glad that I answered him honestly and let him know that Roberto and I would share all responsibilities at home and at work. Being part of a marriage where all responsibility is shared equally is very important to me. I really respect Roberto’s dad for asking me tough questions.

A conversation you didn’t see is the one I had with Roberto’s mom, Olga, who is such a sweet, lovely woman. She actually gave me a crystal heart inscribed with the words “Love Never Fails.” My mom gives me similar things, so this gift meant a lot to me. Roberto’s mom also taught me to cook tostones. I don’t cook, but I would definitely be willing to learn for Roberto :). The night ended perfectly. Did you see the way his parents salsa danced together? Such chemistry between the two of them. I know I would have a lot of fun with Roberto s family.

Onto the Cape. The most important part about my visit with Chris is how being at home relaxed him. He was almost a completely different person. I think Chris was really nervous throughout this journey and that’s why we had a hard time connecting. At home in Cape Cod Chris was completely himself. It was so wonderful to see that side of him. I got much closer to him on this date. I loved that it started at the beach during a rainstorm. There is something incredibly romantic about that. I definitely want to be with a person who can go out in a rainstorm with me and just have fun. Even if it means ruining my boots. Oh well, so worth it! Also, how cute is his dog Jetty?

We laughed about the beer in my purse because I actually had a beer in my purse earlier … long story. Also, I want to clear up the story that I told about the bracelet last week. Chris joked with me that it was my “get-out-of-jail-free card.” We thought it was a funny joke. Luckily, I never had to use it. Chris’s dad is an incredible person. I am so grateful to have the chance to get to know him. I love that their family slogan is “love is the only reality.” I think that is especially relevant in this situation.

Next stop, Wisconsin. Kirk‘s dad and stepmother were also great. I know his dad’s basement was a little much for a lot of , including myself, but I have to respect him for doing what he loves. After I got over the initial shock of all the stuffed animals, I got to sit down and have a really nice chat with Kirk’s dad. He even showed me how to put a deer eye in a foam deer head. If I can’t find a job after the show is over, Kirk s dad said there is a future for me in taxidermy.

Kirk s grandma reminded me so much of my grandma. I heart her. My grandma also cared so much that everyone at the table was happy and content before she could even think about eating her food. All the women in Kirk s life are great. I m sure they gave him lots of love when he went home.

Last but not least, we take on Chicago! I absolutely love Chicago, so I was really excited that this was my last hometown date. To be honest, this visit was one I was most looking forward to so I was a little bit disappointed when Frank seemed off at the start of our date. But I didn’t think much of it because Frank was always concerned about the process so I just thought he needed reassurance and it would pass. I was surprised to hear Frank say that love is complicated. I’m hoping that my relationship with my husband is the one thing in my life that isn’t complicated. Yes, there will be tough times and we will have to work hard at it, but I never want to wonder if that person is right for me.

You didn’t see my conversation with Frank’s dad. He told me he doesn’t think Frank is ready to be in a committed relationship. I was unsure what to think about those comments, but was grateful that his dad was being completely honest with me. When he first told me this, I thought he was talking about Frank not being financially ready to settle down, but as you can see in the previews, that wasn’t the case. I had a great time with Frank s family. They are super funny and easy to get along with. I was laughing the entire time I was with them.

It was incredibly difficult for me to say goodbye to Kirk. I didn’t want him to feel like his family had anything to do with my decision. His family was great. Last season when I was on The Bachelor, my dad was at my hometown visit and met Jake but it was never shown on TV. I remember my dad calling me and asking, “Did I do something wrong?” It was so heartbreaking to hear him say that. I don’t want Kirk’s family to feel like they did something wrong. In fact, since I am unable to speak to them, I would like to take this opportunity to thank them for inviting me into their homes. I really enjoyed meeting all of you. You’re a great guy, Kirk. One of the strongest men I have ever known :).

Until Tahiti!

xoxo, –Ali Fedotowsky

P.S. SANDY and NONE, I got my dress from Alice + Olivia :). I saw in the comments that you were asking about it so I just thought I would let you know. I love that dress too!

P.P.S. Thank you for all of your kind words: STACEY B, NOELLE, EMMA, CHERYL, KATIE, KRISTIN, PAM, PEGGY SUE, BOSTON LADY, TWEETY, AMANDA and many more. I really appreciate all of your support.