Alaskan Bush People's Rain Brown, 14, Opens Up About Her Struggle with Depression: 'I Lost Any Want to Be Healthy'
"I stayed in bed for about four days with minor aches and pains and I couldn’t find out a reason, it bothered me so much, I lost any want to be healthy or motivational," Rain Brown wrote in a candid Instagram post
The youngest member of the Alaskan Bush People family is opening up about her battle with depression.
Rain Brown, 14, took to Instagram Tuesday to discuss her mental health and share an uplifting text image with her followers that reads, “You may not understand today or tomorrow, but eventually God will reveal why you went through everything you did.”
“For the past few days I’ve been struggling with some things, such as my depression, life, and some teen girl probs too (ya know a broken nail😏💅🏻) and I couldn’t figure out why I was in such bad shape I stayed in bed for about four days with minor aches and pains and I couldn’t find out a reason, it bothered me so much, I lost any want to be healthy or motivational, I was just a husk,” Rain, who is the youngest of the Brown’s seven children, began the post.
“But just now in the middle of the night it occurred to me, sometimes you don’t have to have a reason sometimes you don’t have to be perfect and somedays you just feel like staying in bed and watching old @simplynailogical videos and that’s OKAY! In the time of all this happening I told myself that over and over but it also hit me I had to actually believe it and just let it go and stop being bothered by it,” she continued.
While Brown admitted that she continues to “still feel kinda down and Like being lazy,” she believes it’s “alright because my body knows what it needs and if that’s rest I won’t be one to refuse.”
She concluded by encouraging her fans to, “Stay strong my rainbows and listen to your body and soul they know what you need, don’t let your depression or dark feelings try to make you feel bad or people make you feel bad for doing what you know is right for you❤️🌈 Ps my mom gave me some panaway oil and now my aches feel so much better thanks mommy!!!”
The past year has been a trying time for the Brown family. On an emotional episode of the Discovery reality series in June, audiences learned that family matriarch Ami Brown has been diagnosed with lung cancer.
“Ami started getting sick months ago and we didn’t know what it was, but it changed from the point of ‘something’s wrong’ to ‘something’s wrong,’ ” Ami’s husband Billy said on the episode.
“I don’t care who you are. I don’t care what you’ve been through. I don’t care how old you are. If you hear that your mother has cancer, it’s going to shock you,” said Rain. “I just wish I could change it somehow. I’m very scared for her.”
WATCH: Alaskan Bush People’ Mom Ami Brown Diagnosed With Lung Cancer: ‘I’m Very Scared for Her’
Speaking with PEOPLE in August, 53-year-old Ami— whose throat was raw from the radiation and had dropped from 128 lbs. to 89.4 lbs. — said she refuses to give up hope, despite doctors having given them somber survival statistics (as low as 3 percent).
“I realized early into this that it’s very easy to want to give up and just die. And on the pessimist side, it could be my last days,” she said. “But I have the will to fight.”
“Worrying about it only makes it worse. There is hope and that hope is having faith in God. You can’t give up. I tell people be happy. Just be happy. It’s a choice,” she said. “Things can be hard and you just want to curl up but you have to shine.”