September 05, 2006 05:00 PM

• “I think I’m too hard to be in love with. It ends up on the cover of every magazine. I scare people away. I’m a lot to take on.”
Jessica Simpson, on how her celebrity ruins relationships, after getting burned by her too-public affair with John Mayer, to Ellen DeGeneres

• “It was the hardest boyfriend I ever had to break up with.”
Fergie, on her past addiction to crystal meth, to Time

• “It’s the hope of every parent, famous or not, to have your child upstage you. So I love it when a little girl in the airport screams, ‘That’s Nicole’s dad!'”
Lionel Richie, on his more famous daughter, to Time Out New York

• “I thought to myself the second that happened, I was like, ‘That’s typical Maria. Typical.'”
– Newly-crowned U.S. Open tennis champ Maria Sharapova, on how appearances aside, she’s a “dork” for sending the lid flying off her second Grand Slam trophy during the trophy presentation

• “Two more Combs. Two! World, you’re in trouble now.”
Sean “Diddy” Combs, announcing that he and model girlfriend Kim Porter are expecting twins, on his Myspace page

• “I am look forward very much to the festival, where I am intend to watch many Hollywood blockbusters films and then produce DVD copies of them for sell in Kazakhstan.”
Borat (a.k.a. Sacha Baron Cohen), on attending the Toronto International Film Festival

Brad Pitt

• “Angie and I will consider tying the knot when everyone else in the country who wants to be married is legally able.”
Brad Pitt, on why he and Angelina Jolie have no immediate plans to wed, to Esquire

• “I gave up trying to be cool at 16, and never looked back.”
The Office’s Rainn Wilson, being unapologetic for sharing traits with his character, uber-dweeb Dwight Shrute, to Rolling Stone

• “If I couldn’t win that show, with all of my experience, I should just give up and move to a deserted island.”
30 Rock’s Tina Fey, on how she should be the Last Comic Standing if she were to appear on a reality-TV show, to Life

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