They Said What? 2011 Oscars Funniest Quotes

Jude Law takes a swipe at Robert Downey Jr.'s past! James Franco pokes fun at Charlie Sheen! Check out the outrageous – and off-color! – quotes from the Academy Awards

01 of 11
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Michael Caulfield/WireImage

"Your closest association with a superhero would’ve been in 2001 when you got busted in a cheap hotel with a woman dressed as Batgirl."
– Best Visual Effects co-presenter , reminding Iron Man star where he’d be without technicians – and ribbing him about his infamous 2000 arrest, when he was caught with cocaine and a young lady in a Wonder Woman costume

02 of 11
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Time Life Pictures/DMI/Time Life Pictures/Getty; Luiz Martinez/Broadimage

"I just saw Marky Mark."
– grandmother, sharing a celeb sighting (Mark Wahlberg!) from her seat in the audience

03 of 11
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Kevin Winter/Getty

"You’re pretty good-looking yourself. What are you doing later on?"
The Fighter’s Melissa Leo, propositioning presenter Kirk Douglas after her Best Supporting Actress win

04 of 11
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Kevin Winter/Getty; Jorge Herrera/WireImage

"I, um, I’m Banksy."
– , pretending to be the mysterious graffiti artist, who’s left his tell-tale markings around L.A. recently

05 of 11
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Kevin Winter/Getty

"Roxy Sorkin, your father just won the Academy Award. I’m going to have to insist on some respect from your guinea pig."
The Social Network scribe Aaron Sorkin, teasing his daughter after winning the Oscar for Best Adapted Screenplay

06 of 11
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Kevin Winter/Getty

"Yo. My Oscar-winning performance as a queen was much more realistic than Colin Firth’s as a king."
– Presenter Russell Brand, jokingly translating Helen Mirren’s French comments into English

07 of 11
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Michael Caulfield/WireImage; Inset: Kevin Winter/Getty

"Melissa… I’m not gonna drop the F-bomb like she did. I’ve done that plenty before."
The Fighter’s , referencing foul-mouthed costar Leo and his own swear-laden rant, after winning Best Supporting Actor

08 of 11
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Kevin Winter/Getty

"That’s gross."
– , commenting on The Wolfman’s graphic transformation before presenting the movie with the Oscar for Best Makeup

09 of 11
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Gary Hershorn/Reuters/Landov

"I’m afraid that I have to warn you that I’m experiencing the stirrings of something in the upper abdominals which are threatening to form themselves into dance moves, which joyous as they may be for me, it’d be extremely problematic if they make it to my legs before I get off stage."
Best Actor winner , cautioning the audience about his dancing skills

10 of 11
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Gary Hershorn/Reuters/Landov

"The first televised Oscars was in 1953. I was 5 years old. So for those of you who stink in math, I’m 47."
– Former Oscar host Billy Crystal – who turns 63 on March 14

11 of 11
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Kevin Winter/Getty

"You got to wear a tuxedo, so I wore this. The weird part is I just got a text message from Charlie Sheen."
– , taking a shot at the troubled actor’s playboy ways after appearing onstage in Marilyn Monroe-style drag

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