Kim Kardashian's $10,783 Valentine's Day Sex Toy Gift Guide Is Everything You Never Wanted to Know About KimYe's Sex Life
Kim released her Valentine's Day sex toy gift guide today, and believe it or not, there's nary a posterior-related piece of paraphernalia in sight.
Kim Kardashian and Kanye West‘s sex life has been making headlines lately, specifically in regards to speculation about what they may or may not do behind closed doors (but don’t worry, all is good between Amber Rose and the Wests).
So in the spirit of the most romantic holiday of the year and giving you another reason to think about Kanye’s bedroom preferences, Kim has released a comprehensive sex toy gift guide on her website and app that (warning) might conjure up some unforgettable mental images of the couple. For those still intrigued, proceed with caution.
Donato Sardella/Getty; Inset: Désir Métallique
Things start off benignly enough; in fact, despite the staggering total price tag of this gift guide, the reality star has actually put together a surprisingly affordable list of items to help you and yours spice up your sex life. There’s a $5 collection of “Steamy” coupons, a $10 candy g-string, and a $25 bubble bath from Philosophy called “Unconditional Love.” But of course, the lady who once asked for a $1 million push present isn’t going to end her sexual shopping guide there. Alongside those budget-friendly, almost G-rated, Valentine’s day accoutrements, there weren’t also some rather raunchy, and pricey, boudoir accessories.
Related Video:VIDEO: Kim Kardashian West Sips Tea with Serena Williams
The gift guide also includes a $69 silk blindfold, which is almost completely indistinguishable from a regular ribbon, a $100 “discreet” snowman-shaped vibrator, and in a show of pure, outrageous opulence, a $10,000 bottle of Armand de Brigand Brut Rosé Champagne (which you may remember from the time Beyoncé poured one of these rare bottles into a jacuzzi in the “Feeling Myself” music video).
But by the time you get to the $35 Fifty Shades of Grey “Sweet Sting Riding Crop” and the $129 “Spinning Static Dancing Stripper Pole,” you really get a very clear (and rather, um, descriptive) idea of what the Wests get up to in Calabasas. Just pray that Kris’s wing of the house is far enough away that she doesn’t walk in on anything too exciting … and that you don’t see these mental images when you close your eyes to sleep tonight.
What do you think of Kim Kardashian’s Valentine’s Day sex toy guide? Would you buy any of these products? Which is your favorite?