Just minding his own business like everything’s totally cool

By Alex Heigl
Updated April 17, 2015 06:20 PM

Some people – like your roommate’s significant other who is still inexplicably home despite your roommate having left for work three hours ago – have no sense of propriety or boundaries.

Sometimes those people are eight-foot-long sharks.

Bonita Springs, Florida, residents are concerned about an increasing trend in their condos: Namely, that sharks, like the guy in the video above, are appearing ever-closer to the seawall and bay areas of their backyards.

Residents blame people chumming – throwing chopped-up fish parts into the water – for the sharks’ presence, which makes sense, though it doesn’t explain why people would be chumming in the first place. You can fish for regular kinds of marine life without chumming, no?

Locals want the city to get involved and designate the area as swimming-only, thus making it illegal to fish or chum the waters, making this into a state-vs-city issue.

We’re losing the ability to focus because we can’t stop imagining a world in which sharks just roll up to your backyard and hang out – and also a world where your backyard is water like in that Kevin Costner movie.

The Postman, we want to say?

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