Tori Spelling may be busy with five children running around, but she’s got some help.
The actress told PEOPLE at the Elizabeth Glaser Pediatric AIDS Foundation‘s 28th Annual “A Time For Heroes” Family Festival on Sunday that daughter Stella Doreen already has a maternal instinct toward her younger siblings.
“I don’t know if I could do it with five without Stella,” said Spelling, 44. “She’s my 9-year-old, and not because I ask her or make her, but because she’s just a little mommy. Her instinct is so great.”
The Beverly Hills, 90210 alum adds that Stella even takes on diaper duty and feeding the younger kids. “I think it’s born in us,” Spelling says of her daughter’s motherly nature. “I think women can have it, I think men can have it. I think it’s just that instinct, that loving and nurturing, and that’s what she is.”
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“He’s so a fifth child; he is just so used to being passed around,” she explains of Beau. “It’s so funny because you’ll see the little ones carrying him, and kids … even Stella and Liam are 9 and 10, they don’t know fear yet, so they’re just bouncing him around.”
Spelling continues, “I’m like, ‘Wait!’ and [Beau]’s just going with it, he thinks it’s the funniest thing. You realize when you get older, so I’m like, ‘Watch his neck, watch his … ‘ – and Stella’s like, ‘Mom, I got this.’ “
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Even with a full house – there’s also 5-year-old son Finn Davey and daughter Hattie Margaret, 6 – Spelling finds time to enjoy quality time with her husband, which is something the couple have “been working on in our relationship over the past few years.”
“The timing of Beau was like the rebirth, literally, of our relationship and the birth of our fifth child,” she says. “We know how to do it differently now; for so many years we didn’t know how to find time for ourselves — it was all about the kids, because we did start having kids right away.”
“Then we had time to work on our relationship before Beau was born, so now we know how to do it, and we know you just make the time,” Spelling explains of herself and McDermott, 50. “Our time together is as important as our time with each of our children.”