Lifestyle Health Shaun T Opens Up About His Positive Approach to Fatherhood Despite His Difficult Past "I'm actually nervous," soon-to-be first-time father - of twins! - Shaun T admits to PEOPLE Now By Dave Quinn Dave Quinn Instagram Twitter Dave Quinn is an Editor for PEOPLE, working across a number of verticals including the Entertainment, Lifestyle and News teams. People Editorial Guidelines Published on November 7, 2017 04:00 PM Share Tweet Pin Email Celebrity fitness expert Shaun T has been open about his dark past, revealing in his explosive new memoir T Is for Transformation that he was sexually molested as a young boy. They were demons that the 39-year-old began confronting well over a decade ago in therapy, as he was building his brand as a world-famous motivator, choreographer and creator of fitness phenomenons Insanity, Hip Hop Abs and CIZE. And now, as he preps to become a dad for the first time (he and husband Scott Blokker have twins on the way via surrogate), Shaun T is reflecting on how his tough past has actually motivated him to have a positive approach to fatherhood. “I actually didn’t know what it was like, the experience to have a father, until I saw Scott and his dad and how his dad treated me,” he revealed during a visit to PEOPLE Now. “So instead of looking at what I didn’t have before, now I see what a father is and what it can be like. And I can put my life experiences into the experiences that I’ve gotten as an adult.” Want all the latest pregnancy and birth announcements, plus celebrity mom blogs? Click here to get those and more in the PEOPLE Babies newsletter. Johnny Nunez/WireImage Shaun T and Scott Blokker FROM PEN: How Prep-School Abuse Survivor Cheyenne Montgomery Reclaimed Her Life After Being Abused by Teachers at JFK’s Boarding School “I’ve already been through a lot in the past,” he continued. “People ask me, ‘Because you’ve been through this, is that going to affect the way you raise your kid?’ And I’m like, ‘No, my kids are going to have a blank canvas. I’m going to be there to support them.’ ” Just because he’s ready to be a dad doesn’t mean Shaun T isn’t feeling anxious, though. “I’m actually nervous,” he admitted. “I want to be the best dad ever. I know Scott is going to be an amazing parent. I’m just excited. I guess this is the nervous parent talking.” RELATED VIDEO: Exclusive: Shaun T And Scott Give All The Details About Their Baby Shower How Shaun T and Husband Scott Announced They Were Expecting Twins Luckily, he and Blokker have help — starting with an “amazing” house manager who has assisted them in getting their nursery in order. “She’s literally at our house right now,” he says. “The nursery is already done, the bathroom is already stocked with the onesies and the bibs and the towels. I even got the playlist that they’re going to fall asleep to at night.” There’s only been one problem: The couple may be over-prepared. “We’ve gotten so many gifts that what used to be my gym is now packed to the brim with baby stuff,” Shaun T says. “And I’m like, ‘I don’t even think these kids are going to be able to wear all these onesies that they’ve gotten,’ ” he adds, joking, “Because there’s, like, 100 and they’re only going to need, like, 90 in the first three months.” T Is for Transformation is out now.