October 03, 2016 02:30 PM


Sarah Michelle Gellar is not necessarily preparing for her kids to follow in her and her husband Freddie Prinze Jr.‘s footsteps.

For the mother of two, it’s important to let her son Rocky James, 4, and daughter Charlotte Grace, 7, do their own thing.

“It’s different because I wasn’t the child of someone that was in the public eye, and so unfortunately I think the rules are different,” she told PEOPLE at Kids in the Kitchen at The Grove in Los Angeles on Sunday.

“I think there’s a very different pressure for ‘the children of’ … They can decide what they want to do for themselves. I’ll never push them. But, in the meantime, they have to stick to schooling. My kids have too much stage fright anyway.”

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Gellar says quality time with her family is always a priority. And she feels that her line of healthy baking mixes, Foodstirs, helps bring her family together in the kitchen — and manage the “chaos” of their hectic schedules.

“For us, it’s not about what we cook,” she says, “It’s about the time that we spend together … and for us, it’s about no phones in the kitchen. This morning we made Foodstirs pancakes, and my kids made it all themselves. I put it on the griddle — they did all the work themselves — and we had a really nice family morning.”

As for her 14-year marriage to Prinze? Gellar says the key to a strong relationship is putting in effort.

“It evolves daily, and anyone that tells you that relationships aren’t work isn’t in a real one — and that goes for married couples, friends, family,” she says. “It takes work. We think we’re so connected now because of these different devices, but ultimately we’re becoming more and more disconnected.”

She adds, “It’s about putting that effort in, whether it’s a girls’ night, whether it’s making the most of any moment. My partner and I believe in that. One of the reasons we started [Foodstirs] was to spend time together.”

— Blake Bakkila with reporting by Danielle Garlock

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