“[It’s] all about mom. I am dead to her,” Reynolds joked on Conan Tuesday. “That’s her first words, ironically. ‘You’re dead to me.’ “
In truth, Reynolds, 38, said James seems to prefer mom for one simple reason: She’s the food source.
“Right now she’s starting to say ‘mama,'” he said. “There’s an unfair advantage there. It turns out that breasts are actually a life support system and the child seems to gravitate towards the breasts. I’m just the breastless a–hole wandering around the room and getting in her sight-line every once in a while.”
(Lively seemingly agrees with this sentiment, stating earlier this year that breastfeeding is akin to a “full-time job.”)
Nursing aside, the Deadpool star praised his bride for being one tough (and quick-witted!) chick in the delivery room.
“My wife is the real, I mean she is a mercenary,” Reynolds said. “At one point in the middle of the delivery, the doctor’s cell phone went off and she said, ‘Oh, no. Go ahead, take a personal call. Feel free.’ She was cracking jokes in the delivery room. She may have been on drugs, but I don’t ask personal questions.”
Reynolds admitted he was slightly less composed as his daughter entered the world.
“I was there for the conception of the child, so I thought the least I could do is be there in the delivery room,” he joked. “I’m not going to lie to you. I saw things. But amazing.”
He said he tried to help, but the assistance he offered seemed, well, lacking.
“I was a terrible coach,” he admitted. “There was a lot of clapping. I went for a couple of high fives, which she did not return.”
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