And now, the reality star and wife of Doug Hehner is blogging about how the couple is trying to stay positive — as well as the name they chose for their son.
“We wanted to name our baby the perfect name. A name that is full of meaning, warmth and love. He deserves a beautiful name to be remembered by,” the reality star, 30, wrote in a post published on her website Monday.
The name Otis and Hehner picked? Johnathan Edward Hehner. She notes that Johnathan means “gift from God,” and Edward is Hehner’s middle name — after his grandfather.
“Our firstborn will share [Daddy’s] middle name. I think this is so beautiful and meaningful,” continues Otis, who also previously posted a loving message to her son on Instagram. “I hope this little boy knows how much his mommy and daddy love him.”
She adds, “[Just because we] lost him before we were even able to rock him and bounce him doesn’t take away the immense amount of love we have for him. We will never forget our little Johnathan Edward.”
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Otis writes that she was 17 weeks and one day along when she lost Johnathan and that despite the circumstances, she and Hehner, 35, are trying to find solace in the support they’re receiving from friends, family and strangers alike.
WATCH: Married at First Sight‘s Doug Hehner and Jamie Otis Lose Baby: Our Son Was ‘Too Beautiful For Earth’
“So many people have been sharing their personal stories, sending their best and praying for us. It really is so heartwarming — from the bottom of my heart, thank you,” the post reads. “Thanks for taking the time out of your day and sharing with us the different ways you’ve kept your baby with you, honored his/her life, and learned to cope with their loss. It is so helpful for us.”
Naming their son was something Otis says she heard would help the couple cope with their loss — which made sense for them, since they’d been talking about baby names since the moment they learned they were expecting.
“Even though we’ve been thinking about a name for our baby Hehner for so long, somehow all the names we were thinking before just didn’t fit,” she explains of their process before settling on the right name for their son.
The actress and author also uses her blog entry to get honest about how the loss, which the couple experienced less than a week ago, is currently affecting her daily processes.
“I’m trying to listen and ‘move on a bit’ but I just can’t quite figure out how to continue with everyday life. I just have no motivation to do anything,” she admits, sharing that despite the much-appreciated well wishes from loved ones and encouragement that God “had bigger plans” for Johnathan, she has spent a lot of time crying.
RELATED VIDEO: ‘Married at First Sight’’s Doug Hehner Shares Heartbreaking Post After Losing Baby Boy
Thankfully, Hehner has been her rock, coping by continuing with normal everyday activities.
“Doug has been so good to me with all of this. He’s remained very strong while I’ve felt so weak,” she writes. “I told him I was trying my best to be strong and remain positive but I just don’t even know how. He just wrapped his arms around me and let me cry.”
— Jen Juneau