Holly Madison on What She'll Tell Rainbow About the Playboy Mansion: 'I Want Her to Realize There Is a Way to Feel Beautiful Without Exploiting Yourself'
The author and former reality star says she'll be honest with her daughter about her painful past
“She’s very particular about things she likes,” Madison, 36, tells PEOPLE exclusively. “And she gets frustrated easily — I do too!”
When it comes to the future, the former star of The Girls Next Door says she’ll be open with Rainbow about her own past — tough times and all.
“I would love for my daughter to learn from me,” says Madison, whose new book, The Vegas Diaries, is out Tuesday. “I want to share all my experiences, the ups and downs.”
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Says the former Playmate, who in her book details the pain and insecurities of living in the appearance-obsessed Playboy Mansion with ex Hugh Hefner, “In my 20s, I was the shy violet in the corner trying to be nice all the time. That can get you in a lot of trouble.”
Continues Madison, “I want Rainbow to learn to be verbal and stand up for herself. If I could go back, I’d be a lot more outspoken. I wouldn’t have allowed myself to be made to feel less than.”
As for whether she’d allow her daughter to ever pose for something like Playboy?
“Never,” says Madison. “I want her to be confident and realize that there are ways to feel beautiful without exploiting yourself or putting yourself out there in a way you might regret. I want her to have respect for herself.”
For more from Holly Madison, pick up the latest issue of PEOPLE, on newsstands now.
— Aili Nahas