Why Hilary Duff Initially Felt 'Guilt' Over Having Daughter Banks: 'It Was Just So Sad'

Hilary Duff is mom to daughter Banks, 15 months, and son Luca, 7½

Hilary Duff‘s son Luca Cruz, 7½, is the best big brother to his baby sister, 15-month-old Banks Violet. But it took a little time for him to come around to the idea of having a sibling.

In a recent conversation with PureWow, the actress and mother of two revealed that “The guilt that I felt for bringing her into the world was so big” considering Luca had been an only child for six years.

“It was just he and I for so long that he was like, ‘Why? Why, Mom? Why would you do this? I really just love the way it is,’ ” recalled Duff, 32. “And it wasn’t bratty, it was just so sad.”

After learning she was pregnant, the Younger star remembers asking herself, ” ‘How do I reverse this?! It’s too late now.’ It’s such big feelings. When you’re pregnant, everything just feels more magnified.”

But Duff knew things would be okay once Banks actually made her arrival. As she told PureWow, “He came in after I had her. I was just holding her, and the look on his face was an absolute shock. He just said, ‘That’s my sister!’ And he had to sneeze, so he ran out of the room and was like, ‘I’ll be right back.’ He let out this huge sneeze in the hallway and said, ‘I had to sneeze and I knew I couldn’t do it in here near her.’ ”

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Hilary Duff
Hilary Duff/Instagram

Now, “It’s the best,” Duff said of the dynamic between the two siblings. “It’s a chemical reaction between siblings sometimes where he knows he has to protect her.”

Once in a while that protection can be so intense it actually needs to be dialed back a bit, according to the mother of two. In November, Duff told PEOPLE Luca has been keeping an extra close eye lately on Banks — to the point where he’s scolding his mom!

“He doesn’t want her to ever fall off the couch … sometimes I’m like, ‘I swear I’m a good mom,’ ” the Lizzie McGuire alumna said. “He’s like, ‘Well, you need to watch her.’ ”

“I’m like, ‘She’s gonna fall down. She’s got to learn not to go near that’ or whatever,” she continued in her conversation with PEOPLE. “I sat him down once and said, ‘Hey, you survived and I was your mom, so I swear she’s going to be okay.’ ”

RELATED VIDEO: Haylie Duff Opens Up About Having a Nanny for Her Two Daughters: “My Job Doesn’t Stop”

Banks is Duff’s first child with husband Matthew Koma, whom she married during an intimate celebration at their Los Angeles home last month before jetting off to South Africa for a romantic safari honeymoon. The actress and singer shares Luca with ex-husband Mike Comrie.

The month before their wedding, Koma, 32, debuted a new tattoo in honor of Banks and Luca, which depicted the siblings’ hands grasping one another’s.

“Luca (7) and Banks (1) holding hands just after her 1st birthday. Thank you @curtmontgomerytattoos for engraving my kids,” Koma captioned his black-and-white photo, tagging both tattoo artist Curt Montgomery and Duff.

Duff and Koma welcomed Banks in October 2018, while Luca will celebrate his 8th birthday this March.

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