Celebrity Parents Emily Ratajkowski Is Pregnant! Model and Actress Expecting First Child: 'I Feel a Sense of Peace' Emily Ratajkowski revealed the news of her pregnancy in a candid essay for Vogue about gender By Jen Juneau Jen Juneau Twitter Jen Juneau is a digital news writer for PEOPLE since 2016. People Editorial Guidelines Published on October 26, 2020 03:25 PM Share Tweet Pin Email Emily Ratajkowski is going to be a mom! The actress and model, 29, reveals in an essay for Vogue that she and husband Sebastian Bear-McClard are expecting their first child. She also touches on why she doesn't want to reveal her baby's sex, beginning her essay, "When my husband and I tell friends that I'm pregnant, their first question after 'Congratulations' is almost always 'Do you know what you want?' We like to respond that we won't know the gender until our child is 18 and that they'll let us know then." "Everyone laughs at this. There is a truth to our line, though, one that hints at possibilities that are much more complex than whatever genitalia our child might be born with: the truth that we ultimately have no idea who — rather than what — is growing inside my belly," she continues. "Who will this person be? What kind of person will we become parents to? How will they change our lives and who we are?" "This is a wondrous and terrifying concept, one that renders us both helpless and humbled," Ratajkowski says. Emily Ratajkowski. Cass Bird Emily Ratajkowski Loves TikTok and the "Healthier" Social Media Environment Young Kids Are Creating She goes on to explain her feelings on having both a son and a daughter, and says she doesn't "necessarily fault anyone for these generalizations" about gender, as "a lot of our life experiences are gendered, and it would be dishonest to try to deny the reality of many of them." "But I don't like that we force gender-based preconceptions onto people, let alone babies," Ratajkowski explains. "I want to be a parent who allows my child to show themself to me. And yet I realize that while I may hope my child can determine their own place in the world, they will, no matter what, be faced with the undeniable constraints and constructions of gender before they can speak or, hell, even be born." Emily Ratajkowski. Cass Bird Never miss a story — sign up for PEOPLE's free daily newsletter to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from juicy celebrity news to compelling human interest stories. The mom-to-be says she "used to call myself superstitious, but now I understand it another way. The idea that I could 'jinx' something or the belief that I could project my thoughts in a particular way to bring about a certain result is actually called 'magical thinking,' a coping mechanism one develops to make oneself feel more in control." "I used to use magical thinking whenever I wanted something to go a certain way. Now, though, I don't try to envision a pink or blue blanket in my arms," Ratajkowski adds. "I'm too humbled to have any false notions of control. I'm completely and undeniably helpless when it comes to almost everything surrounding my pregnancy: how my body will change, who my child will be. But I'm surprisingly unbothered. Instead of feeling afraid, I feel a new sense of peace. I'm already learning from this person inside my body. I'm full of wonder." RELATED VIDEO: Emily Ratajkowski Says Hubby Sebastian Is a "Good Photographer" but Not an Instagram Husband In a surprise 2018 ceremony, Ratajkowski tied the knot with actor and producer Bear-McClard, with whom she had only started cozying up in the previous few weeks, at City Hall in New York City. "I got married today," she wrote on a selfie with her new husband as part of a series of pics she posted right after the quick ceremony. In the snap, Bear-McClard kissed the model's cheek as the couple held hands. Emily Ratajkowski and husband Sebastian Bear-McClard. Getty Images While Ratajkowski went without a massive diamond engagement ring (the couple both were wearing a simple gold band), her hubby flashed two other rings on his fingers that read "EM" and "RATA." In a Q&A on her Instagram Story this past March, Ratajkowski revealed she did want to have kids in the future, responding to one fan who asked, "Yes! I just have a lot of stuff I want to do with my life and I want to be the best mom I can be ... so we shall see."