Beverley Mitchell is sharing her story of loss with the world.
“A few weeks later, our new dream of our growing family came crashing down; we had a miscarriage,” the actress wrote. “This was a shock. Honestly, my first instinct was to say I was fine, and to be honest, I was trying to be. I thought I had to be, for my family, for myself. I had to jump on a plane and go to work being surrounded by babies and kids while I was still miscarrying. That was interesting.”
Mitchell went on to explain that even though she had gotten advice from one of her best friends during her first pregnancy about the realistic nature of viability and that it made “perfect sense” from a logical standpoint, it was something she couldn’t wrap her head around at first.
“My heart could not make sense of it,” she revealed. “I never really considered that I would miscarry being that I had already had two healthy pregnancies. This was my misconception, you see, I didn’t know much about miscarriages and I didn’t know many people who had miscarried, or so I thought.”
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Once Mitchell started talking to others about her loss, she found that more people than she originally realized had gone through similar experiences and “shared the same scars” with her.
“I was now part of a group, the unspoken and hidden group who mourn their losses in the shadows,” recalled the 7th Heaven alum. “This was the hardest part, suffering in silence. Every time I shared what we were going through I made people uncomfortable, no one ever knows what to say, and to be honest, there is nothing to say.”
She pointed out, “Most people who are sharing their story, we aren’t looking for anything, just the opportunity to share their story. It is with sharing it that the healing begins, the acceptance that it happened. It is when you ignore it or pretend that it never happened that you cause more pain. Dismissing it almost makes it worse.”
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The actress explained that “a few months” have passed since her miscarriage and that while “with time has come healing,” “it took time” for that healing to really kick in.
“It is crazy how quickly you can adopt the idea of a new life and how fast that can all go away,” she wrote. “I am incredibly grateful for my rock of a husband who had patience while I worked through the gamut of emotions. I had my girlfriends who I relied on too who, though I didn’t talk with them much during this time, constantly checked in and left me messages and gave me the time to heal but also to show the support was there when I wanted or needed it. To these ladies, I will forever be grateful, they are my ride or dies.”
“We still have dreams of growing our family but now more than ever, I look at Kenzie, Hutton and Michael and just feel full,” Mitchell continued. “If we are blessed with more children they will fill us with more love, but for now, I look at my family and I am GRATEFUL, BLESSED and THANKFUL.”
Mitchell wanted to use her Thanksgiving post as an opportunity not only to express her gratitude for her husband and their two kids, but to let others know they’re not alone.
“I share my scars because the one thing I want to say, is no one should suffer in silence,” she wrote. “To speak up and share your wounds, to allow them the opportunity to heal. Let’s remove the stigma, miscarriages happen, they are nothing to be ashamed of.”
“So today I celebrate all that I have because I am surrounded by love and the most beautiful souls,” Mitchell added.