"The hardest year of our relationship was while I was pregnant," Bekah Martinez shared of herself and boyfriend Grayston Leonard

By Jen Juneau
July 16, 2019 01:00 PM

If baby No. 2 is in the cards for Bekah Martinez, she might approach her pregnancy a little differently the next go-around.

The former Bachelor contestant, 24, got real on her Instagram Story Monday about “one of the biggest regrets” she has concerning her pregnancy with her now-5-month-old daughter Ruth Ray De La Luz.

“I would definitely do a lot different,” said Martinez. “I didn’t savor the pregnancy. I feel like a lot of people say this but I really felt it this morning. I was like, ‘Man, I wish I had cherished that time having her in my belly, and really just had more of a chance to celebrate it.’ “

She also shared that she and Ruth’s dad, boyfriend Grayston Leonard, “had a hard time in [their] relationship throughout the pregnancy.”

“It’s funny because a lot of people say the first year of having a baby is the hardest, but for us, the hardest year of our relationship was while I was pregnant,” Martinez revealed.

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Bekah Martinez and family
Bekah Martinez
Bekah Martinez/Instagram

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But once the couple welcomed their first child together in early February, “it was like everything changed.”

“A lot of the animosity and stress and resentment we were holding towards each other went away when we had her, which I’m grateful for, but I wish we got to have fun while I was pregnant,” Martinez shared.

The new mom — who appeared on season 22 of The Bachelor — and Leonard began dating in early 2018 and learned they were expecting three months into their relationship, going on to welcome their daughter together on Feb. 2 of this year.

RELATED VIDEO: The Bachelor Star Bekah Martinez Talks New Boyfriend: We Just Hit It Off

The difficult parts of motherhood are not subjects Martinez has shied away from sharing her experiences with. Last month, she posted a trio of adorable photos of her daughter but admitted that “Sometimes having a baby sucks” despite the cute, photogenic moments.

As the negative comments criticizing Martinez for her choice of words came rolling in, the former reality star clapped back, explaining that she never meant to imply that having a baby of her own “sucks” but that she only wanted to be open about her own struggles with being a parent.

In response to one commenter who wrote that they would never say “it sucks” to have a “healthy baby,” Martinez replied that the criticism against her “isn’t fair” and that she was “not saying having a healthy baby sucks.”

“I’m saying parenting is hard sometimes. It’s not being ungrateful for a healthy child, it’s being human and struggling and being transparent about that,” she said, adding in another comment that she never said her own daughter “sucks” but rather, “She’s awesome.”

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