Justin Bieber Recalls Feeling 'Really Suicidal' in New YouTube Doc: 'The Pain Was So Consistent'
For a new 30-minute documentary special titled Justin Bieber: Next Chapter that serves as a follow-up to his docuseries Seasons, the "Holy" singer, 26, looks back on how he regained a positive and healthy mental outlook after years in a dark place. Bieber recalled contemplating suicide at one point.
"There were times when I was really, really suicidal," he says in the doc. "Really like, 'Man, is this pain ever gonna go away?' It was so consistent. The pain was so consistent. I was just suffering ... like, 'Man, I would rather not feel this than feel this."
"I would just encourage people, hey, if you're feeling lonely, talk about it. Say it out loud. There's a freedom in that," says Bieber. "I could have avoided a lot of pain."
Elsewhere in the special, Bieber explains that facing your hardships and pitfalls is the best way to "grow" as a person: "It's so hard to show your weakness, but acknowledging your weakness allows you to grow."
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Bieber has been open about his mental health struggles in the past, recalling himself feeling depressed while on tours and admitting he once had a "legitimate problem" with prescription pills and sex.
In March 2019, a source close to the singer told PEOPLE he was beginning to "thoughtfully" put his mental health as a priority.
"For the first time in a long time, he is really addressing the things he needs to address," the source said at the time. "And just because he’s not standing on the mountaintop saying, 'I take this specific medication' doesn't mean that he isn't thoughtfully figuring things out."
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The source explained how his wife Hailey Baldwin was instrumental in supporting him through the process.
"Justin has an incredible support system," the source said at the time. "Hailey is his biggest supporter. She is there for him in a way that you wouldn't expect from a newlywed. She understands him deeply, and is 100 percent ready to help him. He realizes how blessed he is to have her."
Bieber opened up in an Instagram post back in March 2019 about "struggling a lot" and "feeling super disconnected and weird." He added at the time: "I always bounce back so I’m not worried just wanted to reach out and ask for your guys to pray for me. God is faithful and ur prayers really work thanks ... the most human season I've ever been in facing my stuff head on."
If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), text "STRENGTH" to the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 or go to suicidepreventionlifeline.org.