Demi Lovato was back on stage Thursday night, a day after revealing she had recently relapsed.
The 25-year-old “Cool for the Summer” singer hit Barcelona, Spain, for the latest stop on her acclaimed Tell Me You Love Me World Tour.
Lovato has long battled addiction, mental illness and disordered eating – and had been sober for over six years before relapsing. She opened up about the incident on Thursday, in the lyrics to her new single “Sober.”
The tune didn’t make it into Lovato’s set on Thursday, according to fans online. But video captured and shared to Entertainment Tonight showed that Lovato did get philosophical about life at one point.
“Life is really, really funny sometimes,” she said. “It can be difficult, but, for the most part, if you do what makes you happy and set yourself free, you’ll live an amazing life.”
In “Sober,” Lovato sings about the guilt she feels about relapsing, asking for forgiveness from her family and from her fans.
“Mama, I’m so sorry I’m not sober anymore / And daddy please forgive me for the drinks spilled on the floor,” she sings on the heartbreaking piano ballad. “And I’m sorry for the fans I lost who watched me fall again / I wanna be a role model, but I’m only human.”
“I’m sorry that I’m here again,” he adds at the end. “I promise I’ll get help / It wasn’t my intention / I’m sorry to myself.”
This isn’t the first time Lovato had relapsed.
In 2011, she entered treatment, where she was treated for bipolar disorder, bulimia, self-harm and addiction. She relapsed after she left the treatment center, then entered a sober living facility for a year.
Last March, Lovato revealed she celebrated six years of sobriety.
But in April, fans online speculated that Lovato had fallen off the wagon when the same photo was posted to separate Instagram accounts: In one post by singer Hayley Kiyoko, Lovato was holding a cup containing a yellow liquid; in the other, the cup appeared to be blurred out.
Lovato responded to fan’s questions: “I don’t have to defend anything but it was Red Bull.”
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In September 2017 Lovato was honored with the “Spirit of Sobriety” award at the Brent Shapiro Foundation for Drug Prevention Summer Spectacular in Beverly Hills.
“Every day is a battle,” she said at the time. “You just have to take it one day at a time, some days are easier than others and some days you forget about drinking and using, but for me, I work on my physical health, which is important, but my mental health as well.”
The Tell Me You Love Me World Tour continues Friday in Madrid, Spain. Additional dates continue throughout the summer and into the fall.