Britney Spears Was 'Very Nervous' to Speak in Court but 'Wants Big Changes': Source
On Wednesday, Britney Spears gave an emotional and impassioned speech in front of a Los Angeles court
Britney Spears wants to feel heard.
After the pop star, 39, spoke in front of a Los Angeles court and shared that she wishes to terminate her conservatorship, a source tells PEOPLE that the singer was feeling anxious ahead of her revelatory speech.
"Britney was very nervous about speaking in front of the judge," says the source. "She was also very grateful that she was allowed."
"This is her life and she wants big changes," the source adds.
On Wednesday, Spears spoke for nearly 30 minutes in a lengthy and impassioned plea to the L.A. court judge as she begged for the termination of her conservatorship.
Several times during her speech, Spears - who spoke rapidly - was asked to slow down by the judge to allow the court recorder to take notes.
"I have a lot to say, so bear with me," she started, seemingly reading from her notes.
What followed was Spears describing the last several years since she last appeared in court to address the conservatorship she's been under for the last 13 years. She emphasized, "I want my life back," and stressed multiple times that she wants an end to her conservatorship without an external, psychological evaluation.
"I want changes going forward. I deserve changes. I was told I have to sit down and be evaluated, again, if I want to end the conservatorship," she said. "Ma'am, I didn't know I could [contest] the conservatorship. I'm sorry for my ignorance, but I honestly didn't know that. But honestly, I don't think I owe anyone to be evaluated. "
During her speech, Spears spoke directly about her family as she claimed they "did nothing" to address her concerns over the last several years. "The control he had over someone as powerful as me - he loved the control to hurt his own daughter 100,000%. He loved it," she said, referring to her father Jamie, who is a co-conservator.
"And I would honestly like to sue my family, to be totally honest with you," she continued. "I also would like to be able to share my story with the world, and what they did to me, instead of it being a hush-hush secret to benefit all of them."
Following a 20-minute recess, Vivian Lee Thoreen, Jamie's attorney, returned with a statement on his behalf.
"[Jamie] is sorry to see his daughter in so much pain," Thoreen said. "[He] loves his daughter and misses her very much."
Listen below to our daily podcast PEOPLE Every Day for more on Britney Spears speaking out about her conservatorship.
During the hearing, Spears was not questioned by her conservators' lawyers, nor have they had the opportunity to rebut her allegations in court. As stated by the judge on Wednesday, Spears still needs to file a formal motion to end the conservatorship.
Britney's Wednesday appearance is the first hearing since her attorney Ingham asked the court to appoint Jodi Montgomery as permanent conservator instead of her father Jamie, as they "requested the resignation" of her father.
At the time, Britney reserved "the right to petition for the termination of this conservatorship." In a statement to PEOPLE earlier this year, Thoreen, Jamie's attorney, said that Britney could file a petition to terminate her conservatorship but never has.
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