"It's far more effective to raise children in happy homes," Hudson says of ending relationships that aren't working rather than forcing them for the sake of family

By Lindsay Kimble
Updated November 16, 2015 03:00 PM
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Terry Richardson

Kate Hudson is about to face her first holiday season as a single woman in nearly five years – and she can’t wait.

The actress tells Harper’s Bazaar in the Dec. 2015 issue that she’s enjoying getting to know herself outside of a relationship.

“It’s nice to get acquainted with myself alone,” Hudson, 36, says. “You know, the goal when you get into a relationship is not to be out of the relationship. It’s to try to stay in the relationship. But if it doesn’t work, you can’t force things.”

Hudson called off her engagement to Muse frontman Matthew Bellamy last December. The pair has one child, Bingham Hawn Bellamy, 4. She was previously married to Black Crowes singer Chris Robinson from Dec. 2000 to Nov. 2006. They share a son, Ryder, 11.

“It’s good to take a second to make my life about getting myself centered, clearing the energy, no overlapping,” she says in the interview. “I’m at that age now. I really do feel very lucky. I’ve had my kids and my relationships. I’ve set my life down – I’m in my house, and I’m alone with my children – and I’m at peace, and that’s a really nice feeling. All I really want in my life is to maintain that.”

The Mother’s Day star says in the past she’s struggled to let go of relationships, even when they’re “not right.”

“I’ve chosen something in my life that I’m very comfortable with that goes against a lot of people’s more traditional feelings,” she tells Harper’s. “If something’s not right, I don’t believe in maintaining something for the sake of what’s considered a traditional family, because I believe that there are different ways to raise children. It’s far more effective to raise children in happy homes.”

And she says the idea that all Hollywood marriages are doomed from the start isn’t accurate.

“I always laugh when people go, ‘Hollywood … look at them,’ ” she says. “I’m like, ‘No, look at the world!’ Statistically it’s tough out there relationships have a fifty-fifty chance. The odds aren’t great, you know?”

VIDEO: Kate Hudson and Nick Jonas Romance Was ‘Just A Fling’ Says Source

The star, who was photographed by Terry Richardson for the shoot, was last linked to Nick Jonas.

A source previously told PEOPLE that Hudson and the 23-year-old’s romance was “just a fling.”

“They are both single and seeing other people too,” the source added. “Kate’s mostly focusing on her boys and doesn’t want a serious relationship right now.”

The December issue of Harper’s Bazaar hits newsstands Nov. 24.