April 23, 2018 12:41 PM

 

Gwyneth Paltrow is getting frank about her struggles in love before fiancé Brad Falchuk came into her life.

The actress opened up about her past in an recent interview with the Sunday Times‘ Esther Perel where she admitted her past romantic relationships lacked “a certain level of intimacy and communication.” The 45-year-old Goop CEO said she subconsciously sought out men who also had intimacy problems so she could place the blame on them.

“In the past, I’ve been in relationships with men who had intimacy issues, so I could be, like, ‘I’m fine, I’m ready to do this,’ and let myself think he’s the one with the problem,” she explained. “In a way, some of the relationships were designed to keep me out of intimacy.”

Gwyneth Paltrow and Brad Falchuk for Goop Magazine
Steven Pan

But that all changed when she entered into a relationship with the American Horror Story producer after a 10 year marriage to Coldplay frontman Chris Martin.

“Now, for the first time, I feel I’m in an adult relationship that is sometimes uncomfortable because he sort of demands a certain level of intimacy and communication that I haven’t been held to before,” Paltrow said. “What came up in the first couple of years of our relationship was how incapable I was in this realm, how I feared intimacy and communication.”

RELATED VIDEO: Stars Come Out for Gwyneth Paltrow and Brad Falchuk’s Black Tie Engagement Party

In January, Paltrow and Falchuk announced their engagement on the cover of Paltrow’s Goop Magazine’Sex & Love issue after dating for over three years. The mother of two debuted her massive sapphire engagement ring that same month at the Producers Guild Awards.

Gwyneth Paltrow and Brad Falchuk outside their glitzy engagement party
Splash News

In an accompanying interview and photoshoot in the Goop Magazine issue, Paltrow hinted at her trouble with intimacy.

“Personally, at midlife, I have tried to accept how complex romantic love can be,” Paltrow said of getting married for the second time. “I have decided to give it a go again, not only because I believe I have found the man I was meant to be with, but because I have accepted the soul-stretching, pattern-breaking opportunities that (terrifyingly) are made possible by intimacy.”

The couple recently celebrated their engagement at an elegant party thrown by Falchuk’s close collaborator Ryan Murphy attended by all of Paltrow’s A-list friends. Guests included Cameron Diaz and her husband Benji Madden, Julia Roberts and her husband Danny Moder, Demi MooreReese WitherspoonSteven SpielbergLiv Tyler and Kate Hudson, who wore a ruffly yellow dress over her baby bump.

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