The Avengers Drop Some F-Bombs as They Struggle Through Reading Infinity War Children's Book
It’s not exactly a heart-warming story, but the Avengers sure are trying to put a spin on Infinity War.
Jimmy Kimmel had the original cast of The Avengers sit down to read a fireside children’s story based on last year’s epic movie that ended with half the world’s population being turned into dust.
“While children love superheroes, I’m not so sure how they feel about intergalactic genocide,” the host said on Jimmy Kimmel Live! Monday night. “It’s no fun to see Spider-Man die. To get the kids back, we wrote a version of that movie that’s kid-friendly, a children’s book, and we asked the Avengers themselves to read it for us.”
With Mark Ruffalo kicking things off, Scarlett Johansson, Chris Hemsworth, Chris Evans, Jeremy Renner and Don Cheadle all take turns reading the story, which Kimmel titled Twas the Mad Titan Thanos. But the cast has a little trouble staying PG as old wounds from the movie are still fresh.
“I’ll finish this, Thor excitedly said,” Johansson reads, recapping the moment where Hemsworth’s Thor sinks his magic hammer into Thanos’ chest.
“Unfortunately, Thor should’ve gone for the head,” Evans finishes, with the rest of the cast mocking Thor for his failed attempt to kill Thanos.
“Yeah, he blew it,” Johansson says, with Ruffalo adding, “F— Thor.”
“At least I got close enough to actually go for something,” Hemsworth says, defending himself. “Unlike the rest of the pathetic, little, useless Avengers.”
The story continues with the cast recounting how some fan-favorite superheroes like Chadwick Boseman’s Black Panther and Chris Pratt‘s Star-Lord turned to dust, and Hemsworth makes fun of Pratt for getting “all emotional about his girlfriend or some s—” and ruining an earlier plan to stop Thanos.
“Glad you got your relationship sorted, half the universe is dead!” Hemsworth taunts.
But all hope is not lost, because as Ruffalo reads, “the Avengers may have a few more last tricks, you can find out in theaters on April 26” when Avengers: Endgame wraps up the story.