Amber Heard Says She 'Felt So Lonely' After Alleged Johnny Depp Sexual Assault: 'No One Knew'

Amber Heard testified under oath Wednesday about an incident when Johnny Depp allegedly conducted a "cavity search" on her looking for drugs

During her testimony, Amber Heard said she felt "so lonely" after being sexually assaulted by Johnny Depp during their relationship.

The 36-year-old Aquaman actress went under oath on Wednesday in the Fairfax, Virginia, courtroom, telling the jurors about the ups and downs of her relationship with Depp, 58, whom she met while making the 2011 movie The Rum Diary.

The first witness brought by Heard's legal team on Tuesday, clinical and forensic psychologist Dr. Dawn Hughes, shared an incident when Heard alleges that Depp, in an alcohol-fueled "rage," performed a "cavity search" on Heard "looking for drugs, and felt it acceptable to rip off her nightgown and stick his fingers up her vagina to look for cocaine and thought maybe she was hiding it there."

Heard, herself, recalled the incident, which happened during a camping getaway to Hicksville, California, with friends for a "party out in the desert." She said Depp accused her of flirting with a woman who was there with them. Heard said he got upset and threatened the woman by grabbing her wrist. Afterward, Depp and Heard went into their trailer to talk about what happened, when he "started smashing things," Heard said.

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Heard said she became confused when Depp kept asking where she was "hiding" something. He started "patting me down," said Heard, who alleged that Depp then ripped off her dress and her underwear.

"He's touching my breasts, he's touching my thighs. He rips my underwear off. And then he—," she continued, adding after a pause, "proceeds to do a cavity search. He said he was looking for his drugs, his cocaine, his coke. I was wondering how I — somebody who didn't do cocaine and was against it, [cocaine] in and of itself was causing problems in our relationship — why would I hide his drugs from him? He was insinuating that I was doing it or something. It made no sense."

"He shoved his fingers inside me," she said while shaking her head. "I just stood there staring at the stupid light. I didn't know what to do. I just stood there while he did that. He twisted his fingers around. I didn't say, like, 'stop' or anything."

Heard said she doesn't remember how she slept that night or whether she confronted him about the alleged sexual assault. "I remember wanting it to be okay ... [and] to go back to normal," she added.

Amber Heard

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"I remember seeing my friends by the pool thinking they were just having a great time, and no one knew. I felt so lonely. No one knows; everyone is just having a good time, you know? Like, normal stuff. So I just smiled, made a joke about how trashed the trailer got," said Heard.

When Heard's attorney Ben Rottenborn, in his opening statements, brought up Heard's allegations of sexual assault along with other forms of domestic abuse she experienced, a spokesperson for Depp denied the allegation, calling it "fictitious" and "for the purpose of Hollywood shock value of which Amber has mastered and used to exploit a serious social movement."

Rottenborn said that Heard "did suffer sexual violence at the hands of Depp. ... You will hear in the most graphic and horrifying terms about the violence that she suffered. You'll hear that straight from her. She will get on the stand and she will tell you that. It happened."

Johnny Depp

Depp is suing Heard for defamation over a 2018 op-ed she wrote for The Washington Post about surviving domestic violence, though she never mentioned Depp by name in the article. The Pirates of the Caribbean actor originally filed the $50 million lawsuit in March 2019.

Depp, who has said multiple times under oath that he has never struck Heard or any woman, has testified that his "goal is the truth" as he seeks to clear his name in the trial, which is being televised live via various outlets. Ahead of the trial, Heard said in a statement that "hopefully when this case concludes, I can move on and so can Johnny. I have always maintained a love for Johnny and it brings me great pain to have to live out the details of our past life together in front of the world."

Back in November 2020, Depp lost his highly publicized U.K. libel lawsuit case against British tabloid The Sun for calling him a "wife-beater." The court upheld the outlet's claims as being "substantially true" and Heard testified to back up the claims. In March 2021, his attempt to overturn the decision was overruled.

If you or someone you know has been sexually assaulted, please contact the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) or go to

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