Zoo Will Let You Name a Rat After Your Ex — Then Feed It to a Snake on Valentine's Day

Bitter and broken-hearted singletons can fork over $5 for a cockroach or $25 for a rat named after their ex

Close-Up Of Snake On Tree
Photo: Getty

If watching a creature named after your ex get gobbled up by a herd of zoo animals sounds like the perfect way to spend Valentine’s Day, then the San Antonio Zoo has just the thing for you.

For those interested in embracing the less romantic side of the holiday, the zoo is hosting a special event in which spurned lovers can name cockroaches or rats after their exes, and watch them get fed to zoo animals.

“Cry Me a Cockroach” will be livestreamed for all to watch on Valentine’s Day, as the cockroaches get fed to animals and the pre-frozen rats are handed over to reptiles, according to the zoo’s website.

Cockroaches cost $5 to name, and rats $25, for which donors will get a certificate declaring the animals officially named after their no-good former partners.

Names can be submitted through the zoo’s website before Friday at 6 p.m., and only first names will be displayed during the feeding.

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The zoo notes that all rodents fed to animals are already dead, and are delivered frozen from a mouse farm. The roaches, meanwhile, are alive and sourced from professional roach breeders.

“How much would it cost to feed my ex to your animals,” a Facebook commenter joked on the zoo’s post.

Added another, “I thought I was a bigger person, who had left all pettiness behind, as I’ve been happily married for 8 years, buuuuuuuut… I wanna do this.”

While it’s the first time the San Antonio Zoo is hosting such an event, plenty of other zoos have done similar.

Last year, the El Paso Zoo hosted “Quit Bugging Me,” in which they fed cockroaches named after exes to their meerkats.

They’re hosting the event again this year, only this time, they’ve expanded to feeding other animals, like orangutans and rhinos.

El Paso Zoo Director Joe Montisano has also vowed to eat one cockroach for every $1,000 the promotion raises. So far, he’s at seven.

The stunt is also similar to Burger King’s latest promotion, which allows people to exchange one printed photo of their ex for a flame-grilled Whopper.

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