This Week's 10 Best Celeb Quotes

Ashton, 0. Demi's shoes, 1. Plus: More from Jennifer Garner, Lance Bass and others

01 of 10
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SGP Italia srl/WireImage

"When it comes to getting dressed, men are a little bit more important than handbags but less important than shoes. At any rate, we are merely accessories."

Ashton Kutcher in an essay he wrote for the September issue of Harper's Bazaar

02 of 10
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Jeff Vespa/WireImage

"I respectfully ask that the media allow me to receive care and heal in private during this difficult time."

Owen Wilson, after being hospitalized following a suicide attempt

03 of 10
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"Personally, my friends and I, we know exactly where the United States is on our map."

– Miss South Carolina Teen USA Lauren Caitlin Upton on the Today, getting a second shot at answering her flubbed pageant question about why one-fifth of Americans are unable to locate the United States on a map

How well do you know geography? Take Lauren's quiz here!

04 of 10
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INF

"James is the best kisser ever!"

Keira Knightley, dissing previous smooch partners Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom in favor of her current hunky Atonement costar James McAvoy

05 of 10
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Universal Studios

"He had to stay away from my boobs."

Jennifer Garner, on her one rule during fight scenes on the action-packed set of The Kingdom

06 of 10
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INF

"This dumb reporter just put words in my mouth and turned everything I said into a negative. I told her I love New York and I will probably be doing the bi-coastal thing now because I love it so much."

Lance Bass, denying he dissed the Big Apple in an article for New York magazine

07 of 10
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Ethan Miller/Getty; Trae Patton/NBC

"Charlize would say, 'Excuse me, Paul. I have to go prepare,' and she'd go back, and they'd be playing Deal or No Deal.

– Director Paul Haggis, on actress Charlize Theron's addiction to the Howie Mandel-hosted game show while filming the drama In the Valley of Elah

08 of 10
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"My eye jelly just touched your eye jelly!"

Conan O'Brien, to Jeff Goldblum, after the actor convinced the talk show host to rub eyeballs with him during an increasingly bizarre interview on Late Night with Conan O'Brien

09 of 10
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Bauer-Griffin

"When they told me I was getting it on, I thought it was going to be like a beeper, but it's like a pair of Bose headphones."

– Rapper Eve, complaining about her court-mandated alcohol monitoring device

10 of 10
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Jemal Countess/WireImage

"I just live my life."

– Illusionist Criss Angel, who's been linked to Britney Spears and Cameron Diaz, saying his image as a serial dater is simply, well, an illusion, to Parade.com

Last Week's Best Celeb Quotes >

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