Warning: photos might be disturbing to some viewers
Aimee Green, of Cornwall, England, was excited to welcome her first child, Luna Valentina, on Nov. 29, in a home birth. But the 23-year-old’s joy turned to grief when the little girl didn’t survive.
“She passed away there and then. She never cried, opened her eyes or anything,” Green tells PEOPLE of Luna. “She was a perfect, healthy baby … nothing was wrong until the last push. I felt she was stuck like on a bungee cord … and the cord snapped. All of Luna’s blood was lost. There was no reviving her.”
Green, who had four midwives for the birth, rushed to the hospital along with Luna and her boyfriend Ryan, she says. Doctors told them that there was nothing they could do to save the baby — even if the birth had been in an hospital.
“It has been confirmed by consultants and placenta and umbilical cord tests that this would have happened even in the hospital,” Green says. “[They said] they wouldn’t have been able to perform a C-section in time to save her before delivery because there weren’t any signs that anything was wrong.”
Even though doctors assured Green that the death was unpreventable, the grieving mother says she still felt “guilt.” However, she says, she now knows that she shouldn’t shoulder any blame.
“I don’t regret my home birth, as it was incredible. It wasn’t because I had a home birth that Luna’s cord was too short and snapped,” she says.
“My home birth gave me the strength to deliver her naturally without any medical intervention, in a setting I had envisioned and it was incredible, even now it’s my most treasured memory.”
Green’s story has made headlines in recent weeks, as she’s shared Luna’s story in a blog and has been working to launch a new charity to benefit families of stillborn children.
“I would like mothers to know that I am an absolute minority,” Green tells PEOPLE. “If Luna was here I would also be raving to all of my friends and family and all social media platforms how amazing [home birth] was. It’s the calm, natural state I had also envisioned.”