Jeff Lewis and Boyfriend Scott Anderson Split After a Year of Dating
"There was just a real lack of communication with us," Jeff Lewis said on Monday's Jeff Lewis Live
It's over for Jeff Lewis and his boyfriend Scott Anderson.
The Flipping Out star, 50, revealed on his SiriusXM radio show Jeff Lewis Live on Monday that he and Anderson called it quits over the weekend — explaining that, despite dating for a little over a year, the past 8 weeks had been "rough," with the two constantly at odds.
"He's had a lot of anxiety, a lot of frustration, and it got to a point where I felt that he was hyper-critical of me," Lewis explained. "It was a lot of negativity and always complaining."
"I feel like I worked very hard in the relationship. I felt like I was very good to him," Lewis recalled. "Look. I'll be honest. Sometimes he bugs the s--- out of me. But the positive always outweighs the negative. So I look past things and I let them go. [But] it's been like weeks of negativity, and I found that it just started waring on me. And he just stopped communicating. So then I could feel him next to me, just angry, pouting, seething, resenting me."
Eventually, the two had a conversation where Anderson allegedly told Lewis, "I think we should break up."
"It was his idea to break up, which I then agreed because I was just very, very frustrated," Lewis said, adding that the two exchanged some nasty text messages afterwards. "I'm kind of like a dog: I don't need constant attention but I need to feel appreciated. And once in awhile, just acknowledge me. Just acknowledge something that I did good.
"There was just a real lack of communication with us. We speak two different languages," Lewis confessed. "And for me, I need more affirmation and acknowledgement and those kinds of things once in awhile. The beating me up and the hypercriticism, it just became suffocating to me."
Lewis and Anderson first started dating last March, and went Instagram official with their relationship in August, posing for a photo on pal Meghan Weaver's page.
This was the first public romance the house flipper had been in since he and ex Gage Edward had spit after 10 years together. The two share daughter Monroe, 3.
Previously, Lewis had said that he was considering marrying Anderson, telling pal Andy cohen back in August that he "would consider putting a ring on it."
But there were bumps through the way, with Lewis and Anderson briefly breaking up back in June, when Lewis expressed that things were particularly heated in his custody battle. They reconciled but in February, Lewis said the two were in couples counseling.
Those sessions helped, Lewis revealed — so much so that Lewis now said he feels guilty about not trying with a therapist again with Anderson.
"The one thing that I do regret is that he had said, 'I think we should talk to [a therapist]. And I said, 'I really am kind of done working on this,' ' Lewis said on Monday's Jeff Lewis Live. "That is my one regret."
All things considered, Lewis said, he's happy they parted on good terms — something that hasn't happened when Lewis has ended relationships in the past.
"I never have a good breakup. If I'm mad at you, it's going to be easier for me to move on. And that's my M.O., that's my pattern," he said. "[But] I took a few swipes, he took a few swipes, and then I checked my behavior. I said [to myself], I don't want to end it this way. He's been a good guy. So I said, 'Look, you are a very nice, kind man and you have been such a positive influence on me over the last year and I'm really grateful and I appreciate how sweet and generous you've been with Monroe. And I wish you the best and I truly mean that, I truly mean that.' And so, I said, 'Hopefully, eventually we can be friends.' "
"I actually am proud of myself for taking that approach," said Lewis. "Normally I would just annihilate somebody and I would just blow everybody to pieces and that would be it. I'm hoping that he focuses on the nice things and the better parts of the text."
"You know, we might need a little space, a little distance," he said.
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One thing Lewis doesn't want to hear? Criticism from fans over the way the relationship ended.
"I anticipate a lot of, 'You chased away Scott just like you chased away everyone else. You're so toxic! You're going to be sad and lonely.' Well, too late! I'm already sad and lonely so it's not going to get worse," Lewis said.
"Why do people always assume it is me? It could be Scott!" Lewis said — before laughing about his "track record."
Jeff Lewis Live airs weekdays (12 p.m. ET) on SiriusXM's Radio Andy (Ch. 102).